Sitting In My Schofield

Indiana Birth Parents Search

2008-06-17T05:18:00.001-07:00

I told you all, that I would be back. Well, here I am. As if, any of you honestly missed me. My latest search, is that of my Birth Parents from Indiana. The reason being, is because I lost my Mom this past February. Due to, complications of back surgery and secondary illnesses.

Never-the-less, I thought the time appropriate, to start looking for my actual birth parents. My Dad, has no idea that I'm doing this. I felt it, unimportnat not to tell him right away. I could not bare, breaking his heart, any further this year. Just after, the loss of my Mom.

I hope by telling you all my story, that someone might see it. Furthermore, they might pass it along to the appropriate people. Thus, deciding to respond to me, without fear or rejection. Please, again do not feel hesitant to respond to me.

Please, consider that, I have now lost two mothers and one father. As a result, I have developed a pretty tough exterior over the years. Although, as of late, it seems to be even tougher. To complicate things, my child underwent a quite evasive surgery, in March of 2007.

We so desperately need, a current medical history. In the hopes that, we can find answers to, his medical condition. Furthermore, that we may stop the need, for any further surgeries. This is my story.

Female~

Born~ March 11, 1970

Hospital~ St. Francis Hospital.

Place~ Beech/Beach Grove, Indiana.

Birth Mother~ Sixteen years old.

Her Schooling~ Two years of High School.

Her Siblings~ Identical twin sister.

Her Birth Place~ Indiana.

Her Hair Color~ Sandy Blond.

Skills~ Was said to have been artistic.

Her Height~ About 5 '6

Birth Father~ Nineteen year old.

His Hair Color~ Brown or dark.

His Height~ About 5 ' 9.

He Lived~ Supposedly, lived in the same neighborhood as my birth mother.

Status~ My birth parents, were unmarried at the time of my birth.

Please respond, if you recognize this story. The health of my child, and the "mental health" of myself depends on it. Thank You~

Here I Go Again

2008-06-11T11:28:00.000-07:00

Evidently, I havn't had much to say, for quite some time. However, those days are long gone. Life has changed so much, since my last post. I just wish that, I would have been committed enough, to keep my Blog updated. As for today, I just wanted to say hello again. As for tomorrow, well that's another story. See you then...

BACK IN THE DAY

2007-04-19T08:45:00.000-07:00

Recently, my husband and I, have been talking about, the cost of living. As usual, we've been shuffeling things around. Meaning that, we've been trying to "once again" make ends meet. This is in lieu of, me remaining at home. As usual, to take care of the house, kids, and dogs. All of which, can't do without me. We've even discussed what we can, and what we can not do without. He has even suggested, selling one of his most prized posessions. He says that, he can do without this, until our kids are grown. Now... the Sattelight Dish! I think that, he has lost his mind. I do so love "my dish." I love other things too, but that's another subjuect. What I meant is, I love keeping the utilities paid etc.

I'm strating to feel like, we've become those old people. You know the ones that, you try to avoid? Instead of, hearing about their ailments, you get to hear about, just how much it cost to live these days. Twenty years ago, I could have carred less about, a fixed or flexible mortgage loan. Now I give-a-crap, I guess you could say. Whereas, twenty years ago, I didn't even know what one one. I even spoke with my former husband last night. He was, dropping our son off after dinner. I asked him, did I imagine this or, "did $ 75.00 use to buy us two weeks worth of grocerys?" He replied, "yes, I think it did." So that's might insight for the day.

NOISES IN THE NIGHT

2007-01-29T05:09:00.000-08:00

For the past two nights, something has fallen in the middle of the night. Saturday night, one of my decorative plates in the kitchen, fell out of it's hanger. It actually took out two other plates, on it's way down. It only actually destroyed one of them though. Last night, one of my husband's college decorations, fell from it's spot in the den. I suggested that, maybe we've awoken one of the gods. Meaning that, we've upset somone. My husband agreed.

I suppose that, you're all lost by now. I'm saying that, one of the many spirits in our lives, is upset. I'm also sure that, I know who it is. It's probably my late Mother-In-Law. I've been hard at it lately, investigating her death. For those who don't know, my Mother-In-Law, was murdered in her apartment in 1972. She lived alone, worked for NE Telephone Company, and was only 30 years old. At the time, she resided in, Chelsea Massachusetts. Her muder, still reamins unsolved.

Also at the time of her death, my husband and sister lived in our home state. The children, his father, new step-mother, and new half sister, had relocated here. According to my Father-In-Law, she worked many hours at her job. She also had a tendency, to party many hours as well. She was just not equipped to take care of two children. Being an orpahn herself, she was never taught how to be a parent. No maternal instinct I guess.

Yet, I've digressed I guess. I also, have a tendency to do that. So please bare with me. However, the more that we find out about her death, the more his Mother seems annoyed. Furthermore, the more obstacles we face in doing so. My Husband suggested that, she might be afraid that; we might find out some things, that might tarnish his image of her. He assured me that, it wouldn't. However, we wish that, we might one day, find all of the answers to her death.

FINDING PAT

2007-01-28T12:59:00.000-08:00

According to my last post, I have been absent from my Blog since, September of last year. Appearently, I have been very busy. I think that, I just got bored, and had nothing great to write about. Furthermore, finding any information, regadring my late Mother-In-Law still exist. Our family now believes that, the Chelsea Massachusetts Police Department, are more crooked then ever.

Whereas, they never found out who murdered her, in November of 1972. Furthermore, they took it upon themselves to clean out her apartment. They caught wind that, she had no family living in the area, and took her belongings. My Father-In-Law blew a gasket, and demanded some of the items back. They did manage to return some of them.

Recently, I found out that, they had one suspect in my late Mother-In-Law's murder. This man, was also a suspect in a previous murder. The Motive was the same. However, they didn't have enought to hold him. Just as this man left the Chelsea Massachusetts Police Station, he was ran over and killed by a big, black car. Gee... isn't that conveient?

Last year, I also contact the Massachusetts State Police. I wanted a copy of the Police report. They informed me that, those files had since been destroyed. Conveient as well, don't you think? I also contacted a Detective in charge of the Massachusetts Cold Case Division. He suggested that, the Massachusetts DA, might still have those files. I never heard fom him again.

If you are interested in helping me do research on my late Mother-In-Law's behalf. I would apppreciate it. Whereas, I am out of state and... out of ideas. However, I did contact the Boston Globe this morning. I asked if, the would recover her murder story. I have yet to hear from them. Time will tell.

I STILL REMEMBER

2006-09-11T05:52:00.000-07:00

Five years ago today, my son was in second grade. He was attending his second year, at St. Johns Catholic School. I was just getting into my car, when the school secretary said "an air plane just hit one of the Twin Towers in New York." I didn't think much of it, until I got home, and turned on the TV. This is when, I found out that, this was no accident. Not to mention that, I got home just in time to see, the second plane hit the second tower. I took me back, to the time of our Oklahoma City Bombing. That feeling of udder fear, fell over my body all over again. I didn't think that, I'd ever feel this way again.

I spent the remainder of the day, and the days following, just watching TV. Again, this happened following our bombing. However, at that time, my son was only 13 months old. I had not much else to do, put tend to him and watch TV. Although, after the bombing, I forgot how ever consuming that the TV would be. Again, I fell into a deep depression. In the days following, air travel was stopped. I can remember that, my Great Aunt Grace, had a hard time getting home.

My husband, our three boys and I, had just been on vacation to South Padre Island Texas the month before. Can you believe that, I havn't traveled by air since? My husband, had only once, for his Grandmother's funeral. Has September 11, 2001 effected my world? I would have to say, yes definetly. I still remember...

IT IS OVER RATED

2006-09-10T08:24:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, without much fuss. I agreed to let my husband attend a Bachelor Party out of town. The party, was held about two hours away, at Lake Texoma Oklahoma. My husband's good friend, owns a lake house there. The three of them, have been freinds, for many years. A few others, were suppose to come down, for the party as well. The plans were that, they would watch Football, eat steaks, and play Poker. Whereas, "The Bachelor" has been married before. Therefore, Strip Bars, were not an issue this time. Some much so that, he has been married three times before.

I suppose that, when you're in your early 40's, it's not that big of a deal as well. However, I've digressed from, the real issue here. Not only, did I not fuss about him going, I'm also without kids this weekend. Which means that, I'll be completely alone. Not at all a bad deal. It's just that, I purposly stayed in last night. This is so that, I wouldn't get into trouble. Things like, drunk driving trouble. Not to mention that, I wouldn't have my husband, to fend off men at a bar. So, three of our friends came over, to have some drinks and watch a movie. I thought that, this was very mature of me.

However, I should have just went out, and acted like a fool. It seems as though, my husband is having trouble answering his phone. Last night, his cell phone was, inside the house while they were playing cards. It honestly upset me. I was just wondering how he was, and what they were up to. Although much later, he did call me back. It didn't help though, I was already disgusted. They same thing happened this morning. Thankfully, he called me, just a few minutes ago. He apologized for not answering his cell hone. After nearly severs years of marriage. You would think that, I'm over trying to keep a leash on him.

However, it seems as though I'm not. The problem being, he is always home, and being a good boy. Our freind put it this way last night. It's very unnerving to know that, your husband is out with his friends. Her husband, couldn't understand why I was upset. I ask her, "do you want to take this one for me?" This is when, she explained this to her new husband, of only 11 months. Just as she put it, "you will never understand." Never-the-less, if my husband does as plans. He should be home about 3:00 P.M. this afternoon. Otherwise, I'll still be upset with him. Again, like I said last night, "Bachelor partys are over rated." I'm still crazy ya'll!

PRICELESS

2006-09-07T05:38:00.000-07:00

A painful mouth... Two and 1/2 years... Trips to the orthodontst... Losing 10 pounds... $ 4000.00... No chewing gum... Goofy Middle School pictures... One beautiful High School Senior picture... Priceless!

THE SILENCE WAS DEAFENING

2006-08-31T06:11:00.000-07:00

Yesterday evening, both my former husband and my son, return from Wednesday night dinner. It's nothing that I agreed upon. It's just some extra crap that, the wonderful state I live in, came up with. Just something else to worry about. Just another reason, to get under my skin. If we could only do away with this weekly event, I'd be really happy. Yet, I digress. Anyway, my son walks in, and says "dad wants to tell you about this weekwnd." He says that, "it's his Holiday." My husband, was playing Play Station 2 right next to me. When he quickly get's up.

He goes outside, annoyed of course. This is in regards to my former husbands behavior last Sunday. He then says, "we can play games all you want." "If you want to keep this shit up, we can do it up right." My husband knew that, I was just mad because, my son just got back from their house last weekend. So now, it turns out to be his Holiday agin. Yet another weekend away from our home.

My husband and his former wife, pretty much don't pay attention to the silly Holidays anymore. The only two that any of us are worried about are, Thanksgiving and Christmas. If a silly holiday happens to fall on our weekend with the kids, she doesn't care. We all just leave it at that. That way, not to disrupte the schedule. My husband, was trying to get this across to my Ex. Maybe this was happen with him as well.

Here's the long story short. They both discussed all of our recent problems. Including my former husbands nasty attitude last Sunday. There were a range of topics it seemed. From Dental and Vision insurance to the Trumpet that was purchased. I told him that, I had actually paid 1/2 of all og the dental bills this summer, not the usual 60/40. I'll never help out, in that manner again. I'm tired of being the nice girl.

So there on the porch swing I sat. I didn't say much. I was just completely annoyed that, they were agreeing on alot of things. I know that, this is the adult way to handle things. However, I was in no mood. I wanted to see my husband take my side. Furthermore, I wanted to see some name calling and ass kicking. Wow, that didn't happen. How boaring is that. So my husband says this morning, "you didn't say anything about the conversation to your Ex, after he left. " I said, "what's to talk about, you just took his side on everything anyway?"

We ended up talking it over a little as adult, over coffee this morning. I'm still not amused, with either one of them. All is for the best I guess. See ya'll!

Fireworks In August

2006-08-30T11:03:00.000-07:00

As everyone can tell, I've been absent from my Blog. This Summer has been very busy. However, I'm now back at it. My latest problem, seems to be, my Son's Step-Mother. Although, I shouldn't say latest. She's lways been a problem. This past weekend, was quite explosive. I stood up verbally to my forme Husband. He had the nerve, to enter into my home, with an attitude. Not to mention, in front of our Son, my Husband, and four of my neighbors. We were all sitting around eating leftovers. My Husband's 40th Birthday Party, had been the night before. There was entire refigerator, full of food.

I suppose that dinner, this was part of the problem. My former Husband, had no propane in the grill. Something about, just baking the steaks, and the Wife having errands to run. Let's be honest, those are not my problems. Furthermore, he was already upset with me because, our Son wanted to attend the Birthday party. He started shouted acuzations regarding his missed visitations.

That's when, my head erupted and, I just let him have it. Not physically mind you, but verbally. The law of the land, frows upon, beating the tar out of Ex-Souuses. It's a good thing that I blew up. Otherwise, my Husband, was just getting ready to stand up from the couch. He said that, I finally stood up to him. I'm one of those, "just repress it" kind of people. If I just let it go, them maybe things will be ok. Although, I'm not sure, what came over me. Perhaps that, I had the support of everyone around me. Maybe, It's because I had an audience. Lastly, or just because That this, was the straw that broke the camels back.

To be honest, it was probably a little bit of them all. Hoever, I'm almost sure that, he'll never bring that attitude back into my house. Not without a tongue lashing that is. Then again, maybe he will get physically assulted by my Husband. Legally, that wouldn't be ok. My Husband, would receive a "go straight to jail card, and do not pass go." How many of you play that sort of violence over and over in your head? I know that I do. You think to yourself... if only...

It's just that I am seriously tired of, having to deal with my former Husband's current wife. I know for a fact that, she urges him to behave badly. To play the victim card, the let's be complicated card, and the it's only right card. We all just wish that, she would drop dead. I know what you're thinking. Be careful what you wish for. I will... or I will... ya'll take it easy!

DAYS GO BY

2006-06-29T15:43:00.000-07:00

I have realized that, so far this Summer has just flown by. We've not really done much yet. However, neither has the rest of the Country. I saw on the news last night that, people are taking a pass on vacation this year. Gas prices, and inflation are just out of hand. People just can't afford to do anything. Again, they are just staying close to home. I understand that, and are chosing to do the same. This month, we wnt to a Family Reunion in Indiana. Not completely my idea of fun. Although, guilt plays a huge facotr in that. You never know who, might no make it to next years Reunion. For reasons that, are our of their control that is.

For the remainder of the Summer. I suppose that, we'll just continue going to the Community Center Pool, and to the Lake on Sunday. Again, there's still Softball on Thursday night. There is also the Annual Luau, at our friends house. They have even invited us to, their Lake House, in a few weeks. I know... Whopee! That one is still up in the air. By now you will have figured out that, we are "Lake Trash" with money. Yes, we do so enjoy the Lake. However, I take expensive food, beverages, and toys with me. For example, our boat, along with my Brother and his Wave Runner. Not to mention all of the fun, costly, tubes, skis, and knee board.

So that the gist of my Summer so far. I chase around the kids and dogs. While still find a little time to cook, clean, and do the laundry. I mean, someone, has to wash the beach towels. Ya'll have fun, and be careful!

MY FAMILY REUNION

2006-06-20T05:09:00.000-07:00

For those who just might care, I'm not dead, or ill. I've just been very busy.
Summer has a tendency to do that. I've actually been out of town for a few days as well. Our family, minus my Husband, went to a Family Reunion in Indianapolis. Now that, was an adventure. The adventure included, both my parents, my three sons and I. All of us and our luggage, crammed in my parents Minivan. Last Summer, I swore that I'd never do that again. The ride both there and back, is brutal. In total, I spent about 24 hours in that van.

I honestly figured that, this would be much worse with my two Step-Sons in towe. They actually acted pretty well. We didn't have to get on to them very much. They behaved themselves both on the van, and at the Reunion. They were so well behaved that, we received many complements on their behavior. One of my cousins insisted that, she send on of her Grandsons to our house, to get straightened out. Like my house is a child boot camp or something. I guess you might say that it is. Remember, my Husband, is prior military. Not to mention, a former Drill Sergent.

Now, the house is very quiet. All of the children are gone. My Son, is with his Father, Step-Mother, and half sister for the next two weeks. However, the other two Hulagins will be back on Friday. Not exactly the break that I was hoping for. They were given the choice to stay home, or come back this weekend. They chose to come back. That's both good and bad. Good that they want to be with us. It's bad because, I don't get a complete child free weekend for quite some time. Damn it all!

So, for the next few days, I'll be trying to complete my climb of, Mount Dirty Laundry. Can you even imagine, the pile that was left for me? Although, it's almost done. I've seen such a pile before. Whereas, we've taken the crew on vacation before. It's just been a while. Never-the-less, I was glad to see my extended family. I got to see my favorite Aunt, my other Aunt and Uncle, and eight cousins. All of which, are crazy! I'm certainly glad that, my Brother went this time. He helped occupy my boys. They have entirely too much energy.

So again, we've got yet another Family Reunion under our belt. Our next adventure is, my other Cousines Wedding in September. This time, it will only be my Husband, Brother, and I. It will be a kid free vacation. All of which will take place, on the beach of Willmington North Carolina. My favorite place, the beach. Ya'll take it easy.

PUBLIC PEE POND

2006-06-07T05:22:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, at my sons request, we went to the Community Center pool. Our first trip of the year. It's one of our few opportunitys, to do something together. As luck would have it, we went on Day Care day. It actually wasn't that bad. Thankfully, there was a kid there that my son knew. It was the son of, a fellow softball player. He's about three years younger then my son. However, it was someone that he knew and could play with. We only stayed for about two hours. That was my intent to start with.

When it was time to leave, my son didn't want to. He was still playing with the other boy. I needed to stop by Dollar General on the way home. So I bribed him, saying that I'd buy him something. I ended up buying him, a few somethings. Oh well, it was only the Dollar store. He didn't break me, or anything. The things that you have to do, to get your kids to do what you want them to. Never-the-less, we were out there, just long enough to regain some of our Summer color. Ya'll go swimming!

THE WRONG SIDE OF THE TRACKS

2006-06-02T05:13:00.000-07:00

Again, my Husband and I, had a disagreement about the people he chooses to socialize with. I am still perplexed regarding, just how I became this way. Then, I started analyzing myself and the situation. I think that, it is all because how I was raised. I honestly can't remember my parents, exposing us to the wrong type of people or situations. Not that we were a family of, great financial means or anything. In Indinanpolis, we lived in two very small homes. However, they were in nice neighborhoods. Then again, isn't it always that way, in the beginning? Then, the neighborhoods tend to go down hill, later on in years.

A few weeks ago, this same situation arose. This was regarding, some people who my Husband had invited, to join us at the lake. Again, not that they were completely nasty people. Not that, they weren't nice people either. However, they ended up being, just what I expected. They were strange people. The Father, had a forearm tattoo, and had this huge gap between his front teeth. The Son, was unusually quiet, had long girly hair, and wore a wool hat. Keep in mind, that it was nearly 100 degrees that day, at the lake. Also, I couldn't help but notice that, the Father was, looking at me in an sexual manner. He was trying very hard, not to do so. Although, he wasn't doing a very good job at it.

Here's the new problem that I faced last night. My Brothers coed softball team, needs my Husband to fill in. Although, my Brother, wasn't the one who called. I suppose that, he knew better. Another man from the team called. He is far from being one of my favorite people. He is actually riding the "I hate you fence." He and his wife, have been married for about 10 years or so. They also have a very sweet four year old daughter. My probelm with him is. He talks to both his wife and daughter, very disrespectful.

My Husband brought up the point that, she should be the one doing something about that. I agree with him. However, when it comes to the disrespect of women, I am an advocate on behalf of the women. Meaning that, I have lived that, and can't stand to see woman being treated that way. I guess that, I am both disgusted with her and myself for putting up with, such behavior. The times that, I have been around this 30 something man, I have wanted to punch his teeth down his throat. There is far more to this story then, just this one verbally abusive man.

On this coed softball team is, a whole slew of "White Trash." Some of which, joined us at the lake last weekend. It ended up being not that bad of a day. The couple of who I am talking about, ended up being "the life of the party." I told my Husband this, just because they plan on going to the lake with us frequently. Does not mean that, I want to get "thick at thieves" with them socially. He understood where I was coming from, and agreed. Also, my Brother's Ex-Stripper girlfriend, is on that team. Do I even have to graise the surface, of that one?

Having said all of that, I would still like to plead my side of the case. I am by no means, from a family of high financial and social status. Both of my parents, retired from Lucent Technology. They are just quiet, middle-class, senior citizens. I still shop at, The Dollar Tree, The Dollar General, Big Lots, Payless Shoes, and Wal Mart. I frequent other nice stores too. Just not as much, as one would expect. Heck, I don't even get my nails done. I'm not saying that, I'm better then everyone else. Nor, do I act like it.

I just want my Husband, not to revert back to, the kind of folks that he grew up with. It's almost like talking to, a brick wall. Over and over, I have explained, just how far he has come. What is that saying? If you lay with pigs? I can't exactly remember. However, you get the gist. Someone please give me you opinion, I need n opinion!

BRACE YOURSELF

2006-05-31T05:14:00.000-07:00

Today, our middle Son, has an appointment to get impresions for his new braces. I honestly feel for him. I remember what that was like. It was only six years ago, when I got my braces on. I was the ripe old age of 30. I wore them for 2 and 1/2 years. I'm sure that, he will have to wear them for, atleast that long. I too have an appointment as well. I havn't wore my ratiainer for some time now. Whereas, I actually wore my retainer for two years after, I got my braces off. I'm sure that, my teeth havn't moved. It's actually an unnesary appointment. However, it never hurts to get them checked.

Afterall, my Mom did pay around $ 4000.00 dollars to have them put on for me. They same amount that, I will have to pay for our Son today. Infact, I need to E-Mail his Grandmother to let her know. My former Husband, tends to not help with such things. It is her job, to kick his behind in gear over financial matters. I'm sure that, she will be disgusted that, I even wrote her over these matters. Such is life, she will just have to get over it. I'll let you know how, my Son managed after his appointment today. He shares the same problem as I do. He has overactive gag glands.
Ya'll get to the dentist!

LIFT EM UP

2006-05-26T05:11:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, my 71 year old Mother got an upper and lower eye left. I can imagine what you're thinking. She's a little too old, to be that vain. It's not actually about vanity at all. Her eye lid lift, was for medical reasons. Her upper eye lids were sagging, and obstructing her vision. Medicare, paid for her upper eye lids. However, she paid for the lower eye lids herself. Yesterday evening, I dorve my Son over to spend the night. When I got there, she was a "sight for sore eyes." I just had to say that.

She looked a lot worse, then I thought that she would. Her eye lids, were very bruised and swollen. She looked like a boxer, who had just finished a boxing match. To be quite honest, it was hard to look at her. I could tell that, my Son was having trouble with it too. Whereas, he's only 12 years old. Although, after spending a little time with her, I'm sure that, he is use to it by now. They plan on bringing him home this evening.

Maybe today, she look a little better. Again, they always say that, the third day, is the worst. No matter if, it is an injury or surgery. I'm not sure when, she goes back to get her stitches out. Never-the-less, I'm sure that, she'll start looking better soon. Ya'll have a great Friday.

THE LAST DAY

2006-05-25T11:01:00.000-07:00

A little while ago, I had luch with my Son, and his friends. Yesterday, he begged me to bring, he and his friends pizza. I wasn't going to in the beginning. However, after his Dad said that he couldn't, I agreed to. It's just such a mad rush, in doing something like this. You have to look decent, grab lunch, and be there on time. Not to mention that, 6th graders are loud and annoying. I told my Husband that, I'm sure glad that I'm not 12 years old anymore. Whereas, that was only 24 years ago. I can barely remember, what that must have been like.

Never-the-less, it really wasn't all that bad. It was just sort of loud in the lunch room. Again, I expected that. It's only the last day of school. Anyway, I took two pizzas in with me. You should have sen the swarm of kids, when I brought that in. Let's just say that, I didn't bring any home. I did have one half of, a two liter left. That's ok, you can never have too much Pepsi. There is only two hours of the school year left. Them let the maddness begin. Ya'll have a great Summer.

TIME MANAGEMENT

2006-05-24T04:44:00.000-07:00

This Summer, has already turned out be busy. It seems as though, we've got too many projects going on. My Husband, even took yesterday off, to get some things done. That way, he would have two days off in a row. An unscheduled day off, and a scheduled day off. My Brother told me yesterday that, he is too busy too. He works his normal 40 plus hours a week. He now has three lawns, plus his own to mow. If that wern't bad enough, he's putting in a new deck around his pool, and a new stockade fence. Last week, I hired the wife of a family friend, to help me clean. I had gotten behind, doing other things around here.

As I've said before, I do so love my boat. However, the preparations are a lot of work. I have to reclean it every week, before we go out again. Then, you have to buy "Lake Food" at the Grocery store. Keep in mind, we have to attend to, our lawn as well. Thankfully, our Son, has only today and tomorrow, left of school for the year. Then, he'll drive me crazy for the rest of the Summer. He's actually not that bad. I make it sound worse, then it is. However, my two step sons are. They are a complete Hand Full.

I am still spolied, when it comes to raising children. I have only the one child, all of the time. I honestly don't know, how their Mother does it. She is a "Nutt Case." She raises four children, all of the time. My Husbands two sons, and her second Husbands kids. That's actually more children then, I'd want to deal with. I had the one child, for a reason. I don't have the coping skills. Well, I suppose that I do. I just don't want to have to use them, all of the time. Never-the-less, I suppose that, we'll get everything done sooner or later. Ya'll have fun, and get it done.

SOCIAL SETTINGS

2006-05-22T05:17:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, we officially kicked off Summer. It was our first visit to the Lake. It was a very small group. Only my Husband, Brother, a Family friend and I. Much later on in the day, a man and his son from my Husbands route showed up. To say that I had reservations in meeting them, is putting it mildly. My Husband and I, even had a small, heated discussion about this, before we left. My Husband, is very kind hearted. The problem is, he tends to "drag strays home" as I call it. The people on his route, aren't particularly in the same "station in life", as we are.

My Husband, delivers mail on the poor side of Oklahoma City. Where, lower income people reside. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure that some of them are very nice people. However, I just don't feel the need to socialize with them. Both my Husbands famiys and I, came from "humble beginnings." We both were born in big cities, and both lived in tiny homes. I'm not knocking my parents for this. We all seem to have, very little in the beginning. Last November in Indianapolis, my Husband saw both the homes, that I lived in as a child. I wasn't exactly crazy for him to see this.

My reason being, we've come a long way since then. All that he's ever known us to live in is, a nice middle-class home. The two former childhood homes that he saw, were niether. He explained to me that, he doesn't want to "forget where he came from." I on the other hand, have been far removed from this, for a long time. Whereas, his parents still live in the tiny home that he grew up in. The do this because the kids are gone, and their home is paid for. However, their home remains in a neighborhood that, has gone down hill over the years. There seems to be people of differnt races, and economic standings. By the grace of God, and my parents hard work; they removed us and themselves from that life.

My Husband explains that, it wasn't me who worked my behind off to get where I am today. I certainly understand this. It wasn't me who brought us where I am today. Again, I'm not saying that, we live like the Hiltons or anything. We are just simply "Middle-Class America." I don't shop at expensive Department Stores, or even get my nails done. I even do my own roots, to save money. I'm just a "Thirty Something" who lives in the Heart Land. I also happen to be a "Tiny- Tom- Boy- Mom" to Boot. I don't actually, require the finer things in life. I just like a nice, clean, simple life.

Back to the subject that started this whole conservation. I did finally meet his two friends from his Mail route. This was only shortly after, having even more words regarding this at the lake. I just simply blew my top, and said something nasty. My Husband exchanged unpleasantries for a momnet, then it was over. They seemed to be decent people. Again, still not people that, I wished to socialize with. I still can't get over this couple that, he brought over several years ago. Both needed to visit the dentist and the shower. I even had to Fabreez my furniture, after they left.

I just explained to him that, it was unfair of him to expose me to, these kinds of people. I have no idea when, this became such a big deal to me. However, I did do my best, not to be a complete witch to his newly found friends. That's more then I ususally give. Ya'll have a good Monday!

OVER BOARD

2006-05-19T05:19:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I spent about six hours cleaning our boat. Just part of my Spring ritual. Who would have thought that, it would be that dirty underneath the boat cover. I have used about four containers of, Clorox Wipes, and one roll of paper towel. Not to mention about, one half a bottle of Crud Cutter. That's a heavy duty, all purpose cleaner. My vaccume cleaner was pretty full, when I finished too. I'll admitt that, I'm a clean freak when, it comes to our boat. I absolutely hate, a dirty boat.

I even had to put everyones names, on the inside of, our new life jackets. I branded/wrote our last name on, the new knee board as well. I just don't want anyone to be able to, walk away with anything. People are just jerks. If that were to happen. I want to be able to prove that, they had our property. Then, we'd report them to the Park Rangers. After that, I suppose that, my Husband would kick their Butt. Seriously, he would!

We have also been inviting all of our friends. We have to kick off boat season, with a bang. I'll have to go Lake Food shopping Saturday. Can you imagine the gas total, when we go to fill everything up? We'll probably just pass out. Just think, all of this work, for a few hours of fun? We will come back sun burt, tired, and out of food. Ya'll have fun this weekend.

STUMP THE BAND

2006-05-17T05:55:00.000-07:00

Last night, I had the privilege of going to my son's Spring Band Concert. This was soppose to last one hour. Instead, it lasted three and on half hours. First, they had problems with, the stage lighting. This delayed the beginning of, the concert. Fortunately, or unfortunately, my son's sixth grade Band preformed first. Then the seventh grade performed. Then, the Jazz Band performed. Then, the eighth grade band performed. Then, the seventh and eighth grade Band performed. Then, the sixth, seventh, and eighth grade Bands performed together.

The worst part of it all was that, they handed out special awards during all of this. Not to mention that, it was freezing in the Auditorium. My former husband, his wife, and their daughter left early. My Husband caught a ride with them. He was boared to tears. I say that, it was all too much for him, and was getting on his nerves. He actually said that, if our son had performed more, then he would have stayed. I actually don't blame him, it was pretty boaring. Interesting at times, but pretty boaring.

I did love when, all of the grades performed together. They played "Go Big Red." Not my College team fight song of choice, but it was nice. I'm not an Oklahoma Sooner fan. I'm an Oklahoma State fan. Lastly they played, "The Hey Song." For all of us older folks, this was "Doctor Who." You remember the lyrics? It sort of goes, Doctor Who... oo... hey, Doctor Who. My son and I, have been arguing over, the actual name of this song for days. What can you do? They know everything at this age. Ya'll enjoy the music too!

NUTTS FOR NICKLES

2006-05-16T04:28:00.000-07:00

Today, is one of my most dreaded days. I am having my two male dogs neutered. Although, there are more reason why I should, then why I shouldn't. However, my papered Bulldog, is the most heart breaking. Then again, if we hadn't found him a girlfriend yet, then we're not going to. It just feels like, throwing $ 1000.00 plus, down the drain. Although, he just might paying so much attention to, our female Boxer puppy's private parts. Both my Mom and my Husband says that, this is all for the best. However, I still hate male dogs, without all of their parts. I think that, it looks funny.

Our one year old Boxer puppy, needs this the most. The breader said that, they are very prone to Prostrate Cancer. Not only when they do contract this, it spreads rapidly. Again, the probability of, having out male Boxer get his younger Sister pregnant sickens me. Although, I do live for the day that, I don't get knocked down by our "big boy Boxer." I hope that, this will calm him down. Who knows, maybe the two boy dogs, won't fight so much anymore. Just maybe, the male Boxer puppy won't try and run out of the house, evey time the front door opens.

I think that, I'm counting on this surgery, accomplishing too much. There is the possibility that, it's far too late for my two boys. I'm saying that, their personalitys won't change. If, I had done this a little earlier, then maybe it might have changed them. Although, they are both, one and fours years old. Last night, I just prayed that I didn't lose either one of them, during the surgery. I can't lose anymore dogs, in the near future. My dear Maverick, has been gone for six months now, and I still miss him desperately. Ya'll pray!

BUSY BEE

2006-05-13T07:53:00.000-07:00

It appears that lately, I've been neglecting my Blog. I have been just so busy with, all of our Spring preparations. My Husband was on vacation. That was my first hurdle. We purchased a 1978 Corvette on Monday. I don't have to tell you, what a chore that has become. Don't get me wrong, I do love it. It's just had some things that, needed to be attended to. Like the Speedometer, and an oil change. Both of those are a necessity. Since my Husband was a at work, I had to take care of those things for him. Not that, I minded or anything.

We purchased new Cell Phones mon Monday as well. While we were sitting there; I decided to call and make myself an eye appointment. I went to that on Tuesday afternoon. My eyes had only gotten one step worse. Not too bad for six years. Yes... it had been six years, since my last appointmtnet. I wound up with both, new contacts and glasses. The contact idea, was pretty much mine. I decided that, I wanted them for outdoor use.

Then again, there is the vanity factor. When you are a 36 year old married woman and Mother, vanity is important. When you sort of still "have it going on." You want to keep having it "going on". Who wants to wear glasses, when you are trying to look cute. It's not that, I stumble around with out glasses or contacts. I'm not blind or anything. My Eye Doctor said that, my dependency on glasses, has just increased. I will have to say that, my old eyes have held up pretty well, for as old as I am.

We are still pretty much, laying in wait, to go to the lake. Mother Spring Time, has just no cooperated with us, thus far. It's either been raining, or too cold. We had our boat dewinterized, about a month ago. It's just still just, sitting there in the garage. We keep hoping every weekend that, we will be able to go. Hopefully next weekend, will be our chance. So people... I have got to "get it in gear." Ya'll take it easy!

REALLY... I'M NOT DEAD

2006-05-10T09:48:00.000-07:00

In case any of you have been missing me, I've been preoccupied. My Husband has been on vacation, for over a week. I don't have to tell, all of the other Stay-At-Home- Moms, how that is. Husbands, who are home, are just the kids. I'm mean, you know when the kids are home for Summer vacation. In other words, they drive you crazy. Not that I don't like spending time with my husband, because I do. However, I'm just not use to it. I don't have to worry about anyone but, the three dogs and myself. Again, the dogs usually take care of themselves. Cath ya'll tomorrow.

THE PRINCESS AND THE PEA

2006-04-28T04:27:00.000-07:00

Yesterday afternoon, I needed to run to the bank, to cash a check. If you must know, it was one of those speractic Child Support checks. Anyway, on the way there, I noticed that, the Sleep Gallery, was going out of business. Something then clicked in my brain. I was going to buy a new bed in a couple of weeks anyway. Why not save myself a boat load of money, and not have to go very far as well. Not being there very long, the salesmen and I found, what I was looking for. He said that, this is a "today only deal." That's just so you will buy their merchandise, right then and there.

I called my husband to make sure that it was ok. He didn't have a problem with it. That was all the less that, he had to deal with. Besides, my taste does not stink. Then, I ran by my parents house to borrow the cash, for a week or so. My Dad escorted me back there. He said that, they will need to see my ID, before they accept the check. Do you know that, they didn't even ask for it. Probably because, both he and my Mom, had been in there earlier that day. I took my Dad back to their house, and visited for a little while.

I drove home, then enlisted the help of my next door neighbors son, to help me dismantle our old bed. It's a good thing that, I did that when I did. By they time they got here, I had only minutes to spare, when they arrived. I made their job easy for them. They had no bed for them to take down, and a clean floor as well. You do know that, you can't put up new furniture, without running the vaccume first. That's just gross otherwise. Here is the deal, that I got on my new bed. I purchased a queen size, memory foam matress and bed. I'm talking about both the head and foot board, and rails. The deal that we agree on was, an even $ 1000.00.

I know that, this sounds pricey. However, the bed is a black cherry, oak, sleigh bed. It is so beautiful. I've never had such a fancy bed, in all of my life. Its about time that I did. After all, I am 36 years old. As for last nights rest. Honestly, I didn't get a good nights sleep. It will be quite so time, before we get use to the new matress. This happen with our old pillow top matress. We went from a water bed, to the pillow top. Our middle son, now has our old bed. He slept very well he said. Although, if we don't get use to the new matress, we're going to trade him back. You know, the new one for the old one. Ya'll sleep well!

NO COOPERATION

2006-04-27T08:33:00.000-07:00

As you may have read, I'm working on my Family Tree. However, there are only two of my family members, who wish to participate completely. I'm talking about, such things as names and dates. I honestly don't understand what the problem is. I'm not asking for, your eye color, when you had your last period, or what your shoe size is. I have yet to understand, what people are hiding. Don't they realize that, they are making my job more difficult? I could care less if, you were married once before. I don't even care if, your kids were born out of wedlock. These seems to be the issues that, I'm up against.

As a matter of fact, I too was married once before. This was to my son's Father. He is fully aware of this, and it's not even a problem for him. I have even asked my former husband yesterday if, he would help me complie this Family Tree. He graciously accepted to help me. His new wife, even offered to help me. Even they understand that, they are all a part of my son's family history. Like I've said before, I supoose that, you should just remain seated. Otherwise, those skeletons may fly out of your behind. Thanks a lot ya'll.

MY BRANCHES

2006-04-26T05:47:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I was so busy doing my Family Tree. So busy that, I didn't even get to my Blog. Not that it's a crime or anything. Not that, the world was going to stop, if I didn't. I see that, you all managed fine without me. Although, I am making huge headway on my Family Tree. I have a lot of resources at my disposal. The most precious is, my Aunt. She and her old family Bible, helped tremendously. I just cross referenced what she told me with, what was on the web. Old school, and new school if you will. I am finding that, nothing is better then word of mouth.

I plan on calling my Great Aunt today. She too is a very valued source. One of the only surviving members of, my Dad's side of the family. Even if, my Grandmother was still alive, I probably wouldn't bother her. She was a tight liped, untrustworthy source. The kind where, you never knew, or could trust the truth. Then again, I never really knew her in the first place. She had better things to do then, get to know my brother and I. That's funny, she had better things to do then, raise my dad as well. She left that to, my Great Grandmother. Thank God for her. My search is still on ya'll.

PARTY HARDY

2006-04-24T05:14:00.000-07:00

Earlier last week, our dear friend asked out, to have drinks. We hadn't been out in ages, so it sounded like a good time. This turned out to be true. We drank entirely too much, danced, talked, and laughed. All of which, is good for the soul every once in a while. I will say that, I understand why, we don't go out partying much anymore. We're just simply geting too old. Normally, on the weekends, we're in bed by no later then 11:00 P.M. Instead, we got to bed about 3:00 A.M. Yes, we closed the bar down, then got a quick snack at Taco Bell. All of which, insn't good for the aging body.

However, alot of our frinds were there. My brother even came along for the fun. He doesn't go out much either anymore. He's more of a hermit these days. My very best friend, just happened to be thre for a Bachelorett party. Actually, it wasn't a coinsidence. She suggested that, they go to this same bar. That way we could party together. Although, we didn't even see them, until much later in the evening. By the time we ran across them, we were all feeling pretty good. One of our very buest guys freinds was thre as well. That's no suprise actually, he's always there. He's a 40 year old bar fly.

My two very best girl friends were there. So you know that, I had a good time. My brother actually almost crapped himself, when one of them showed up. He dated one them briefly last Sping. I didn't tell him that, she was coming for a reason. I just knew that, he wouldn' have gone, if he knew that she was going to be there too. He informed her over the phone later that, he really would have gone. He claimed that, it wouldn't have mattered to him. I know him better then that. He would have stayed home. Although, she was only thre half of the time. She and her room mate stopped by, after her bar closed down.

I have found that, the following day. You're body is pretty much remdered usless, after a long evening of partying. You end up dehydrated, tired, hungry, have a headache, and have a hard time in the bathroom. But gee, didn't you have good time putiing yourself in that situation? I checked on everyone yesterday morning. All were fine, and accounted for. There is even some new gossip, regarding my Brother and my friend, his former girlfriend. We'll just have to wait and see, what the Summer has in store. Ya'll party safe this Summer.

MY FAMILY PLOTS

2006-04-21T05:15:00.000-07:00

A few days ago, I requested a piture be taken of, my familys grave site in Virgina. Did you know that, there are actually volunters, that do this for a hobby? They exist in most states. If you're intersted, you'll find this to be true. The nice part is, they ask nothing of you in return. Again, they enjoy genealogy, and don't mind helping out fellow searchers. A very nice man, by the name of Garry assisted me in my endeavor. I think that, I first spoke to him via E-Mail on Tuesday. By yesterday evening, he had already gone to my family's cemetery, and taken the pictures.

He had taken 15 in total. I had no idea that, most all of my relatives were buried there together. I asked to repay him in some way. He said that, he was glad to do so, and that I didn't owe him a thing. Again, he said that this was a hobby of his. He also told me that, the Cemetery was only less then two miles away from his house. I'm considering doing the same, for people's family, who are buried near me. My husband will probably go off of the deep end on this. However, what he doesn't know won't hurt him. We actually only have one tiny Cemetery in our small town. There is also just one samll Cemtery, one town over.

I'm guess that, I'll just "pay it forward" for someone else. Again, there isn't enough good in the world. Genealogy, is becoming more popular each day. I guess that, people are becoming more interested in their family history. My family historys, are actually kind of tainted. Meaning that, secrets exist almost everywhere. The secrets are as follows. Both my brother and I are adopted, from different familys. My Dad, actually never knew who his Dad was. My first husband's Mom, has a different Father then the rest of the children.

Lastly, my current husband's Mother was, strangeled to death in Massachusetts at the age of 30. They never found out who was responsible. This is why, I can find a mystery at every trun, in my family. I have my own personal mysterys to solve, if I want to. Like I've said before, I'm sort of afraid of, what I'll find. My advice is, stay seated if, you don't want skeletons to "fly out of your behind." Happy searching ya'll!

I DREAM OF WHAT?

2006-04-20T04:59:00.000-07:00

I have yet to fully understand, the true reason of why, we dream what we do. Although, I think that, I've partially figured it out. It has alot to do with, what we've seen, or expeience during the day. Last night, was really confusing. I won't go into detail about it. However, it had to do with characters that, I had seen on TV during the course of the day. Why do we, or I, incorporate these characters into our dreams? Maybe it's that, we would like to identify with them on some level. Possibly because, our personal lives are that boaring.

I actually think that, It's the Television shows that I watch. Why these people, end up in my dreams is a mystery. I actually agree that; the subconscious is in almost total charge when we are dreaming. In life, we would never do the things, that we do in our dreams. It's kind of a reprieve, from the daily ho-hum. You get a free pass to do other things, and be someone else. Not another person, just another kind of person.

I seem to be, alot less responsible. Actually, alot less, is putting it mildly. I'm actually, too care free. That's all that, I'm going to say about that. I wouldn't want to completely embarrass myself. Again, I suppose that, dreaming isn't all that bad. It must be healthy on some level. I think that, it's probably some form of therapy. If that's the case, then I owe myself alot of money. I dream nearly every night. However, my "alter" if you will, seems to be a naughty person, when I'm asleep. It's still, so confusing. Ya'll dream well.

WHAT'S IN A NAME?

2006-04-19T07:51:00.000-07:00

Today, I was watching the usual morning TV. Appearently Tom Cruise And Katie Holms had their baby. They named her Suri, it means Rose. So why didn't they just name her Rose? Yesterday, I was online doing some family history, surname research. In this life time, I've had several first and surnames. My birth name, which I have no idea what that is. They called me Julie, at the Foster home. My first and middle name that, my adoptive parents gave me.
I have the last name, from my first marriage. I also now have, my last name from my current, marriage. Then, I also have the my nick name, which I go by.

It is no wonder that, I have been in an idenity crisis all of my life. An identity complex, if you will. I guess that, I never knew who I was in the beginning. However, I have paved the road of, who I am suposed to be. I didn't chose my adoptive paretns, they chose me. However, I did chose both my first and current husbands. Therefor, I did chose those last names. I read somewhere that, with every last name change, you too change. I read that in a numereology book. They were speaking in terms of women, when they get married.

I suppose that, there is some truth to that as well. You are nolonger the person that you once were. Evidentally, you're energy changes too. I guess that, I'll go along with that. You change, and you're energy changes. For future refernce, don't name you're kids something dorky. They are the ones who have to, put up with the teasing for the rest of their lives. I have so hated my full first name all of my life. In response to this, my son has only one name. This is so, no one can get under his skin, by calling him by his entire full name. Pretty smart don't you think? Catch Ya'll later.

THE BOAT JONES

2006-04-18T05:16:00.000-07:00

Summer is finally upon us. It is that time of year again. Time to get our boat dewinterized. In fact, I need to make an appintment for this week. My husband said that, thursday would be best, since it's his day off. It's actually been unusually warm here, for the past week. If, it hadn't been a holiday last weekend, we would have already hit the lake. I don't forsee us going this weekend though. The temperatures for the next week or so, is going to be much cooler. Perhaps we will go the following week. Never-the-less, I do this every year.

I can't seem to wait to get out there. However, in a month or so, I'll be sick of cleaning the boat. Including, all that goes with it. Like buying "lake food" and getting ready. It's like getting ready for a mini vacation every weekend. There's making sure that, there is enough food, having all of the chairs, and making sure that all of the swim gear is in tow. If... we temporarily lose our minds, and decide to take all three dogs. Well, that's another story. I don't actually see that happening.

Our Bulldog can't swim. Our puppy, would have to be watched like a hawk. Lastly, the older puppy would be like taking Marmaduke. Three kids, and three dogs, would be entirely too much to handle. Although, we did take Marmaduke and his brother, last summer when they were puppys. Not this year though. This year, they weigh 80 pounds, instead of 20. In retrospect, we will have another fun summer. Ya'll have fun too.

TAKE ME OUT...

2006-04-14T05:16:00.000-07:00

Yesterday evening, I had the opportunity to go to my husband's softball games. As usual, eveyone had missed me, and was glad to see me. There were hugs all around when I got there. My secret plan worked. My husband had no idea that, I was going to be there. Number two son, had no school today, and stayed with Granny and Poppa last night. He get's very bored watching my husband's games. Sometimes there are kids there, and sometimes not. Anyway, you should have seen my husband's face, when I parked next to him in the parking lot.

He was just getting ready to go inside the ball park, when I pulled up. He leaned down, to make sure that it was me. Then, he got the biggest smile on his face. He said over and over, "what a nice surprise." I said, "either you were actually glad that I'm here;" "or you were caught off guard, because you were doing something wrong." I was just joking about that naturally. So, I was handed the score book. That's my job, when Angela isn't there. She is, our team mates wife. She had an MRI, scheduled for late yesterday evening.

Never-the-less, they won both games. That's pretty good for, a bunch of old men. When now have one guy, in his twentys. He is, the baby of the team. The actual age ramge on our team goes from twenty something, all the way up to early fiftys. Quite a big age gap. However, they always have fun, and it works. I'm sure that, the team will fold, when the olders guys decide to quit. My husband refuses to play with anyone else.

However, it will be time for him to stop playing as well. After all, he will be 40 in September. My Dad, stoped playing softball at the age of 35. That probably has something to do with the fact that, I was born then too. Having said that, they will just keep playing, as long as their bodys let him. Ya'll go out to the ball game to this weekend.

MICKY'S KIDS

2006-04-13T05:17:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I was given the opportunity of babysitting the kids, of a longtime friend of mine. I will say that, I felt a little overwhelmed, at the thought of taking care of three children that I had never met. I considered the possibility that, they would make me crazy, while tearing my house down. On the contrary, they did no such thing. I should have known that, my friends firm parenting, would play a part in their behavior. I say only a part because, they live with their Mother and Step-Father.

I too, am a member of the "you can only do so much club." Meaning that, it's easier tp parent kids, while they are with you. I go through this with my Step-Son's. I try and supersede, the poor parenting and bahavior, while they are visiting us. This is in hopes that, some of it "will stick." That's not saying that, they will remember any of this, when they are away from you. We personally, just have the problem of, unfirm parenting. This is in regards to both, my former husband and my step-Son's Mother.

I think that, they are both ruled by the parenting philosophy of, "just fly by the seat of your pants." In other words, let them go, and hope for the best. This does not work for me. I have to be plugged in. The world is nolonger simple. It is also not the same place it was, thirty some-odd years ago. We have much more to worry about, in raising our children. However, my friend, has done a fine job with his three kids. They are no more crazy, then my own three kids. I'm glad that, he felt that I could handle them. Ya'll take it easy.

A LIFE TIME AGO

2006-04-11T05:15:00.000-07:00

I was watching the Today show this morning. As usual, they give today's date. For a moment, I was wondering what, was so familar about the date. Then I realized that, it was my wedding anniversary to my former husband. Not that I wish things would have been differnt. I am actually so thankful that, I got out of that situation when I did. At this point, we have been divorced longer then, we were married. I refer to my son's dad as, that guy who I was married to for about five minutes.

In all actuality, I have been married to my second husband, for A little longer then first husband. My first husband and I, were only married for six years. My second husband and I, were married for six years this past Novemeber. However, we have been together for over seven years. I'm not saying that, one has been entirely easier then the other. Although, this second married seems to be getting easier, the longer that, we are married.

The failure of my first marriage, had many contributing factors. Number one, our young age at the time that we were married. Number two, A child that, my husband was not ready to have. Number three, our finances, were always a mess. Number four, the inability not to get along. I'd go into that further, but I chose not to today. It's all so depressing. The mind has it's own defense mechanisms. One in particular is, the ability to forget tramatic events. Possibly, a little forgivness as well.

I'll admitt that, I nolonger feel the need to be bitter about the whole situation. Why should I care about him, or what happened in the past? I honestly don't care. I just do my best to get along with the guy, for our son's sake. Besides, I'm an adult now, and I don't care. I just have the satisfaction of knowing that, my husband now, has helped me raise my son, longer then his own father did. No that, my former husband isn't part of his life. Not just a big part. The "at home" part, and the "90 percent" part. The part where, he's with us, more then he is with his father.

I just keep in mind that, my husband and I, play a bigger role in his upbringing then his father. Atleast, I have a little peace of mind knowing that. Yet I digress. If you were wondering how long ago, all of this occurred, it was April 11, 1992. Fourteen years, is a life time ago. The last seven have been the very best. The ones that I've spent with my husband. We still have our ups and downs. Although, more ups then downs. That's they way it should be. Ya'll take it easy. Just be thankful for the past, and what it's taught you.

ALL SHOOK UP

2006-04-10T05:43:00.000-07:00

My neighbors, The Shooks, lost a loved one this past weekend. Mr. Shook's dad died Thurday evening. He was only 66 years old. However, Mr. Shooks father, had been suffering from cancer. At his last Doctors visit about six weeks ago, they had only given him about two months to live. Unfortunatly, this came a little sooner then expented. No matter how expected death is, it always seems to come as a shock. Death seems to work that way. You know that it's coming, but is still a surprise.

At my last count, there has been many deaths since last November. Both Maverick and Sue died in November. Glen and Rick died in February. Only Leo died in March. Lastly, Mr. Shook died in April. I have yet to figure out, what is is going on. Perhaps it's just coinsidence, that we know all of these people. Personally, I never met Rick nor Mr. Shook. Although, my husband worked with Rick, and Mr. Shook was the father of our neighbor. However, since we are a close neighborhood, it effects us all.

I actaully don't have much to say, on the subject of death today. It just simply seems to happen. The older I get, the more accepting of it I become. So... ya'll try not to get "knocked off" today!

BIKER BOY

2006-04-09T06:40:00.000-07:00

Just a short while ago, my husband left out, for an afternoon on the Motorcycle. Have fun freezing your behind off on the interstate. Not to mention, against the wind. He said that, they will be back around 4:00 P.M. The reason that, I don't go is because, he refuses to buy me a back rest. Therefore, I have to lean against him. It's just such a big mess that, I need a back adjustment, by the time it's all said and done. When you don't fork out the cash for a back rest, then the wife doesn't go.

I'm sure that, this is his intention in the first place. So, have a good day, with you're smelly Biker friends. Besides, I've got more important things to tend to. Like, the floors and the laundry. I need to touch up my roots as well. You see, my blonde, is artifical unintelligence. Ya'll have a good Sunday.

TOO MUCH FREE TIME

2006-04-07T05:26:00.000-07:00

Yesterday evening, my husband started his spring softball league.
I don't usually get to, go to any of the spring softball games. I have to wait until number two son, is out of school for the year. Which is almost upon us. Never-the-less, my son and I spent a quiet evening at home together. Knowing that, Noel had to go to the vet today. I decided to paint her toe nails last night. I'm almost positive that, she knows that, she's a little girl. She never gives me any trouble when, I paint her nails.

However, just to start trouble, I painted Tigger's front toe nails. Not without, my son's help of course. Tigger did not want this done by the way. Anyway, I only painted his front ones. My husband claims to be so observant that, I decided to test him. Test his military training you know. After sitting on the couch for a while this morning, I finally said, "I am so mad at you, you didn't even notice." He says, "notice what?" I say, "what we did to Tigger." He then says, "what did you do, paint his nails too?" I tell him, "yes!"

I thought that, he would notice this atleast, before he left this morning. Afterall, I did find the brightest red nail polish, that I could find. He claimed that, he was still asleep, and to give him a break. Then he informed me that, "you'll be taking that off today." Well heck, I knew that! I only did it for fun. The bottom line is, he's not always that observant. Ya'll watch what you are doing today.

BLOOMING CRAB APPLES

2006-04-06T05:23:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure if, it's the changing of the seasons or what. Possibly, the time change, or it's just me. However, everyone in my family, seems to be very crabby lately. They all have something to complain about. No one, has anything pleasant to say. It has become, very depressing to listen to. From work, to vacation, to finances, to school. All of which are understandable reasons. I'm the only one around here, who trys to keep a positive attitude.

This is why, I'm starting to think that, I'm the reason that they are all crabby. There is only about three people, who aren't in a bad mood lately. Those people are, my brother, my Aunt, and my best friend. Who knows, maybe they are not grouchy because, they don't live with me. One can see why, one could get a complex from, all of this negative treatment. I suggested to my husband that, I should call my mother's Doctor regarding her attitude. He says that, "she's just old." Well, I don't buy it.

From past family history, other relatives have claimed that, my Grandmother was this way too. I'm talking about, my Mother's Mother. Maybe, she just genetically predestined to be critical. Although, I don't want to feel this way about her. I want to have a good relationship with her for, her remaining years. I do want to miss her, when she's gone. My Dad doesn't seem to be this way. How he has put up with her, for over 50 years is, beyond me.

She is so very spoiled though. He traded in his fairly new truck, and bought her a 2003 Cadilac yesterday. She is so obviously ticked off at me, about vacation that, she didn't even tell me about it. I had to hear about it from my brother. He says that, "he's turing into the favorite." No little brother, you've got about 30 years of cathing up to do. So... good luck on that one big boy! So... I'm going to try to avoid, any further negative energy from them today. Either that or, move to Italy. Bye ya'll.

SECRETARY OF MY INTERIOR

2006-04-05T05:22:00.000-07:00

Can you believe that, I'm back at it? I'm still painting. Not the walls this time. I'm painting my old childhood bedroom suit. Not my bed, just the dresser and book case. What was once white, was now yellowed and dirty. So I, put a fresh coat of white on it. I can't actually believe that, I kept all of that stuff. However, it is old and distressed, and is by now an antique. It was my first bedroom suit. I think that, I was about a year old, when my parents bought it.

Considering that, I'm 36 years old now, it's pretty old. Again, what was old, is now in. I'm not one to throw something out, so I refurbished it. I sort of like the challenge of, redoing something. I'm pretty crafty that way. Afterwards, I'm proud of the work that I've done. The family always says, "hey... that looks pretty good." All I have left to do today, on my book case is some touch ups. I also have to put the handles back on. I repainted them gold as well.

I don't know about you, but this time change is killing me. I feel drained all day long. It is going to take quite some time to get use to it. I think that, I need a morning nap. I mean I don't think, I know it. Ya'll have a good day.

VACATION VIOLATION

2006-04-04T04:47:00.000-07:00

Appearently, my parents have really done it this time. Yesterday, they attempted to make Hotel reservations in Indianapolis for June. However, they were all booked up, for this specific week. This is after, my parents asked both my husband and brother to ask off from work, for these specific days. Instead of, doing the intelligent thing, and just making reservations at a different Hotel; they do the unthinkable. My parents make reservations, the week before, just because they had available rooms at the Hotel they like.

My Mom tells me that, she oked this with everyone else in our family. Not the most important people, her immediate family. She did say that, "there is more then just one person envolved." The ones that, are actually still working for a living, doesn't seem to matter. The family members who are not retired. I'm not sure if any of you are familar with Indianapolis, Indiana. Anyway, there is either a Hotel, or Motel on almost every corner. Just because you love, this particular Hotel, doesn't mean that, you have to stay there.

I will say this, they disgusted alot of people, when they pulled this. My husband said, "whatver!" My brother used the phrase, "G.D it!" My son, does not want to go without us. Lastly, it's pretty obvious how I feel. Have fun! Smell ya later! My Dad stated that, "my Mom tried," and that, "it will all come out in the wash." I said, "it sure will, witout any of us there." Happy vacationing ya'll!

BURST YOUR BUBBLE

2006-04-03T05:20:00.000-07:00

Yesterday afternoon, my three sons decided to take advantage of the warm weather. They had a water baloon fight in the front yard. As usual, they were making a huge mess. However, they were having fun, and staying out of my hair. During their fun, I went out front to have a cigarette, and to see what was going on. I soon found that, our older neighbor boy, was joining in too. He does this because, he doesn't have many friends his own age. He's 17 years old, and three years older then my oldest son.

While outside, I witnessed him make two out of my sons cry, by being too rough. He hit number two son in the back, too hard with a water baloon. Naturally, this made him cry. Number two son yells, "I hate him, he's such a fag!" Then, he hit number three son in the knee. He was standing close to the brick wall outside when this happened. Again, he too cried. In retaliation, number one son dedided that, he was all but, going get both his clothes and shoes wet. Around and around on the ground, in a circle he went with the water hose. Never actually getting his belongings wet. While I'm watching this Bully says, If you do... I'll get really pissed, and... I come over there and pop you in the face."

Bully actually did, warn him of this three times, not to do so. I then replied, "A... no you won't." Bully replys back, "oh you don't think so?" I say, "if you pop him, then I'm going to get their Dad, and he will come out here, and pop you in the face." He says, "then I'll tell him that, I warned him three times." I headed inside, not before witnessing number three son, put a water baloon in his shoe. Guess what, it burst by itself. While I was inside, Bully got mad a left. What it boils down to is, he can dish it out, but he con't take it.

Soon, I told my husband about what just went on. He said that, I had said the right thing. He told me that, he wouldn't have punched Bully in the face, only out of respect for his Dad. They are good friends. My husband said that, he would have just draggged him home by his neck. Then, made him explain to his Dad what he had done. This was in the event that, he had actually punched number one son in the face. He said that, his Dad would have killed him if, he had hurt one of our boys. He has punished him in the past for doing this.

Having said all of that. My husband told nunber two son that, you should all three just get Bully down, and beat him up. Three on one, isn't good odds. Number one son weighs about 95 pounds. Number two son, weighs about 85 pounds. Number three son, weighs about 75 pounds. This would be up against, about 150 pounds. Although, Bully is both a Football player, and wrestler. Maybe, it wouldn't have turned out so well. You never can tell though. Ya'll be kind, and love one another.

APPLY WITHIN

2006-04-01T06:33:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, for the first time in years, I put in an application for work. My husband nearly fell over. I had taken a shower after my son went to school. Although, I showered the three dogs before, I did myself. After all, it was "Funky Friday." Funky Friday means that, everyone get's a bath, every Friday. It just simply means, their weekly bath day. I always have to put cute names for everything. It makes it easier to remember. Yet I digress.

Anyway, I did all of this, and got home before 10:00 A.M. My Husband said that, "it was entirely too warm outside, for hell to have frozen over." Gee... he's funny, isn't he? I checked on a job with the local plant nursery as well. They need mostly people to work on the weekends. Nope... can't do that. I have both kids, and a life. I am not going to be dealing with plants on a Sunday, when I can be sipping a beer on my boat instead. Besides, I need the tan too. I am so stinking pale at this point.

As far as Baby's Birthday, it turned out, pretty well. The former husband, took our son as well as, my step-son's along for his Birthday party. Eveidentally, they had a really fun time. It helps when, former husband, treats the step-kids, like one of his own. He's just an overgrown kid himself. Which was infact, part of his problem the whole time we were married. He never grew up. Happy Saturday ya'll!

BABY GET'S BIG

2006-03-31T05:13:00.000-08:00

Today, is our middle son's Birthday. He is actually, "my" only biological child. I have two step sons as well. Anyway, he turns 12 years old today. It's actually hard to believe. The older he get's, the older I feel. He and I talked about it last night. I started going into labor, around 6:00 P.M. the night before. I then checked into the hospital around 9:00 P.M. That was the beginning of a long, grueling, painful process. Even though, I was barely 24 years old at the time. I wouldn't want to go through that again ever.

This is why, we are suppose to have children when we are young. So that we can withstand all of the pain of childbirth. I'll admitt it, I was, and still am a whimp. After giving birth, I am convinced that, I am not physically made to have children. I don't have those big "birthing hips." I suppose that's why, I was in labor for so long. It's probably why, after he was born, Dr. Fuller said that, he should have been a C section. I was in labor from 6:00 P.M. on March 30th, and didn't have him until 12:53 P.M. the next afternoon.

Dr. Fuller didn't expect him to be that big either. He expected that, he would only weigh around five pounds or so. He said that, "little women fool him most of the time." I weighed 100 pounds even when I became pregnant, and weighed 126 pounds when I gave birth. However, he was two weeks early, and weighed 7" 11. He could have easily weighed eight pounds, had we went full term. This is because, there are 16 ounces in a pound. He could have gained five more ounces easily, in two weeks. However, I think that, Dr. Fuller wanted him to be be born early. I was dialated to a three, so then he scratched my membrane. He wanted to speed things along.

I can remember him saying that, "I'll see you tonight." I thought, "sure you will." Ok... so he was right. Little did I know that, my son's entrance into this world, would set the tone for his future behavior. He wasn't quite ready, and that he would be born, when he felt like it. He would get around to it, when he was darn good and ready. A little encouragement, is an understatement.

Dr. Fuller had to scratch my membrane, put me on a patossin drip, break my water twice, and use the forceps to get him out. Not very willing, was he? That's why they say that, Aries children are, the most stubbon children in the zodiac. Yes, I know, I've experienced 12 years old that so far. Anyway, Happy Birthday to my baby! Bye ya'll!

BARELY LEGAL

2006-03-30T05:08:00.000-08:00

Today, my plan is, to go get a new license. My five year license is almost up. It actually expires tomorrow. However, I'm just going to go an do it today. I've just been putting it off. The license branch, is just such a pain in the behind. Not only that, but you've got to fix up a bit. Otherwise, you have to look at an ugly drivers license for the next five years. It's amazing just how differnt that I look compared to five years ago.

Five years ago, I had longer hair and braces. Yes, I know, a little old to have had braces then. Although, I was 30 years old, when I had them put on. I wore those darn things for two and one half years. Never-the-less, it was money well spent. Not only do my teeth look a bit better, but my migrains are gone. So, it was a wini, win situation. I you've ever lived with migrains, then you know what I'm talking about.

The, there is the cost of getting a new license. It's stupid how, you have to pay for a new one, every five years. I think that, once you've paid for you're initial license. You should just be able to go in, and get a new one for free. Senior citizens don't have to pay for theirs. This includes both of my parents. My Dad joked how his would be free this year. Well, it better be. He is, 72 years old. Let's not get into that debate.

I'm talking about, those who drive at that age. Some folks actually have no business driving. I'm not saying that my parents shouldn't drive anymore. Some other older adults just shouldn't. So later on, I'm off to get my license. I'll try an "Control My Joy." Happy driving ya'll.

WALK THIS WAY

2006-03-29T05:14:00.000-08:00

After watching several episodes of "The Dog Whisperer" I decided to try some of the thechniques that I've learned. In the beginning of your walk, you are to start out standing up straight,with shoulders held high. You are to give the impression that, you are in charge. Well, that only worked with Tigger, as far as our front porch. After that, he drug me through the front yard, and down the street. My neighbor was so worried about me that, she came down to check on us.

She said that both my son and I, looked like a couple of little kids, being walked by three dogs. As mentioned before, Tigger drug me, and the other two dogs drug my middle son. He had the Bulldog Winston, and the youngest Boxer puppy Noel. Again, I had decided that, I was going to be in charge of Tigger. I was going to whip him into shape, while he was on the leash. I actually had it in my head, "I can do this... he's only a big puppy."

Before our half and hour walk, to the end of the culdesac and back, my neighbor showed back up. However, she was on foot this time, with the spike, choker coller in hand. She had actually put two of her smaller dogs collers together. Although, Tigger's neck was far too big for both of those. In the beginning of her training, Tigger bit and fought her. He jumped into her face, and nearly knocked her glasses off as well. Thankfully, she handed them off to me, before he could do so.

Soon I made my son, and the neighbor girl put the other two dogs away. This way, we could work with just Tigger. To make a long story short. She evetually got him to walk properly on the leash. She even handed his leash to me, and he walked fine for me too. I was in complete shock. It was like I had my own Dog Whisperer. She said that we should work with him for, the next two weeks straight.

The training sessions, should do this for about 30 minutes per evening. I agreed because, it's still warm outside in the evening. She said that, she would see me tomorrow, and we would work on it some more together. I asked he if, she thought that he was untrainable, and she said no. I'll be suprised to see if, this does any good. Happy dog training ya'll.

THE CRITICAL HOUR

2006-03-28T05:17:00.000-08:00

Unusually, this morning did not start off well. My husband and I had a brief exchange of words. Ordinarily, I just ignore his criticisms. Although, this has become the norm, for both my parents and my husband. I understand that, I am quite unusual and don't do things in a normal manner. Never-the-less, whatever the task, I always get it done. However, I have become quite sick of, them all telling me, what I'm doing wrong.

This is by no means healthy, for my self esteem. Actually, I have found that, my self esteem no longer exist. I have lived 36 years with, people telling me that, I don't measure up. I don't even like for the telephone to ring. I'm positive that, it's one of my parents calling me with, their daily interpretation of my imperfection. You would think that, this would be a wake up call of some sort for me. However, this happens so frequently that, I've become numb to all of their criticisms.

Since when did they all become the picture of perfection? I guessing that, since they are all so perfect that; this makes them an authority on the subject. How am I suppose to feel,living with a family full of flawless people? There are only two people in my family, who aren't this way. One of which, is my brother. The other is, my favorite Aunt. Both haved lived with, this same problem as myself. They understand, what it's like hearing this same broken record.

However, my brother has not only become numb to all of this treatment, it now falls on a deaf ear. I have decided that, I will nolonger take, judgemental phone calls. In other words, if you are not calling with something nice to say to me, then don't call me at all. I have also decided that, I will nolonger take this treatment from my husband. I plan on firing back at him with, one of his daily imperfections. I am hoping that, if I point out that, he's not so perfect all of the time; then he will stop doing this to me. Bye ya'll.

AND ON THE SEVENTH DAY...

2006-03-27T04:38:00.000-08:00

Yeah... what about the seventh day? I heard somewhere that, he rested. Nope... not me. I worked my behind off. So much for, soaking in my massage from the night before. I knew that, I would do that to myself. I'd sleep like a baby, then wreck my body the day after. Just as our middle son said, "why bother?" Does this child know me, or what? He actually said, "by Sunday night you'll just need me to rub your back again." I can't stand kids that, are too smart for their own good. I'm kidding, he's actually pretty observent.

Here was what I got accomplished yesterday. # 1. I scraped the paint off of the tile. #2. I mopped the whole house. #3. Shampooed the living room carpet. #4. Washed the dog beds. #5. Washed all of the throw rugs. #6. Did regular laundry. #7. Made the bed. #8. Wiped down the counter tops. #9. Oranged oiled the entry way furniture. # 10. Talked to two Aunts, a Sister-In-Law, my brother, and my best friend. # 11. Windexed two doors. #12. Scraped paint from several marble window seals. # 13. Made dinner. # 15. Took a samll nap, early on in the day. #16. Gave the puppy a bath, (she had mud on her). Gee great...# 17. Vaccumed several times.

Having said that, I thought that you were suppose to rest your bones on Sunday? Yeah... I'll remember that next Sunday... not! Hey, I've got a question, do I have a new Blog stalker or something? Someone, keeps leaving me comments. However, the won't tell me who they are. Seriously, I appreciate the praise. Although, they need to "find their nards" and "show their face." If... I have to explain all of that, then you should stay anonymous. So... I'll be hearing from you, right? To the rest of ya'll, have a great Monday!

Sidebar... Hey, I figured out who you were, and it's fine. Maybe if... I could understand what nationality you were. Never-the-less, thank you.

ALL WORTH WHILE

2006-03-26T06:42:00.000-08:00

Last night, I cashed my gift certificate for my Birthday massage. I'm a little sore today, although a whole lot better then I was. I should tell you about my massuse. She is 58 years old, and wife to one of my husbands very good friends at work. She's been doing this at home for only 18 months. However, doing this profesionally for about 20 years. She told me last night that, she didn't know how much longer that, she will be able to massage. She has degenerative bone disease in her spine. This was the result of, a car accident many years ago.

She really is a wonderful woman, one whom which I can relate to. She's tiny and short like me, and young at heart. Although, she is much more stylish. She has a few tatoos, many ear rings, and a belly button ring. None of which, apply to me. Again, whatever blows your skirt up. I am seriously interesteed in, doing this for a living. Something that, I can do at home. She was talking me through my massage last night. I hope that, I can learn how to do this without going to school.

I am in no mood to go back to school. One degree that I don't use, is more then enough. Again, she informed me that, you don't have to have a license to do this in our state. Sounds pretty strange to me. However, remember that, I was doing all of that hard work of painting the house. My massage me it all worth while. Ya'll make each other feel better.

COURT TV

2006-03-24T07:05:00.000-08:00

Today, I have to be at court at 1:30 P.M. Suprisingly enough, my former husband, signed off with no problems on; the "First Right Of Refusal" order. My crafty Attorney, waited one week before the court date, in hopes that good things would happen. Her husband, and her right hand man said, "sometimes it's better this way." Although, I've known my former husband for almost 17 years, he still suprises me. I guess that, you really don't know people, like you think that you do.

The other strange thing is, my son's step-mother, also admitted to my son that, this was all her fault. I'll have to write that down. Something about, "we didn't give your mother all of the needed information." Yes dear, it's much more then just this one time. Try about, seven years worth of "not all of the necessary information." I honestly wouldn't have gone to an attorney over just one incidence. I'm not... all that crazy.

Having said that, I'll be on my own in court today. My former husband won't be there. Also, my wonderful husband and son won't be there either. I'll only be in there for a few minutes anyway. According to the attorney, it's only a couple of yesses, and then we'll be out of there. I told my husband that, this is the one time that, things went our way legally. Not necessarily an interesting episode of Court TV, but it will have to do. Well I'm otta here. Bye ya'll!

A JOB WELL DONE

2006-03-23T05:08:00.000-08:00

For those interested, I'm finally finished painting, and it only took me 10 days to do it. I've got all of the pictures back on the walls as well. My next job at hand is, to get this house back in shape. I only started shampooing the carpets last night. It's amazing how disgusting they were, and still are. I guess that's what happens when you move furniture, and drag around ladders for over a week. Hopefully, my family won't track in the new snow, that fell last night.

I ended up taking a 300 miligram Motrin this morning. Maybe I won't hurt as bad this morning. I've still got a full perscription of those left, from my Hysterectomy in December. I guess that, I should have been taking those all along, during this painting process. As for my new paint, it looks good; if I do say so myself. My family said that, it looks good too. However, I wouldn't want to do this for a living.

Although, if I were getting paid by the hour to do so, I would have made a fortune. Anywho, I've got to get moving, there's plenty left to do today. Have to check on my Mom, later on. She's having eye surgery this morning at 9:00 A.M. "See" ya'll later. Get it... see ya'll... ha!

BACK TO NORMAL

2006-03-22T05:13:00.000-08:00

With the exception of a few touch ups, I am offically finished painting. It's a good thing too, my body is nearly given out. Considering that, I didn't paint myself to death yesterday, I don't feel as bad this morning. I only had one large wall to paint yesterday. Both my hands and back aren't killing me. I now knwo what my husband feels like, an a daily basis. He has such great pains in his hands, from carrying mail for over 13 years.

I couldn't imagine, what that must have felt like until now. Over the past week and a half, I have woken up with swollen fingers. Again, can you believe that he has experienced that, for all of these years? His hands, are in such bad shape physically that, he can never pop his knuckles. They say that, poping your knouckles is bad for you anyway. By the way, that's only a myth. According to my former College, Anatomy Professor; this does no harm harm to your hands. That popping sound, is only gas escaping from inbetween your knucles. So, you've learned something today.

Never-the-less, I only have to put this house back together. This includes, putting my pictures back on the walls. Gee... what great fun. However, I would much rather do that then paint. My husband keeps saying, "I'll be glad when, this house is back together." I'm getting there, just hold your horses! It will happen soon enough. Happy redecorating ya'll.

GETTING CLOSE

2006-03-21T05:15:00.000-08:00

It's amazing, just how much work that you can get done when, there is no one home to interupt you. I seriously got a lot accomplished painting yesterday. I have about one wall left in the hall way. Then, I need to retouch the ceiling, and clean the beams. It probably wouldn't hurt to, clean the one inch thick dust, on the ceiling fan. I've had to borrow the neighbors 10 foot ladder. They understand that, I'm painting, as fast as I can. I honestly need to purchase one. However, it's not often that, I need a ladder that tall. Maybe, I'll find one on sale one of these days.

I also need to put , my pictures back on the wall. That's a job, in itself. I never knew how much work that, this would turn out to be. I will say that, I quite toned up these days. Going up and down a ladder 20 or more time a day, will do that. Not to mention, moving and carrying heavy furniture and decorations. Although, all of this work is taking it's toll on me. My son has had to rub my back extensivly in the evenings. He also rubbed my hands for me this morning. I received a gift certificate, for a massage for my Birthday, from my husband. I plan on making an appointment for this Saturday.

I don't suppose that, falling off of the five foot step ladder Friday helped any. I wasn't actually painting at that time. I was only returing decorations, back on the tall entertainment center. I had too much in my hands, and simply lost my balance. I have now reinjured mu back, twisted my ankle, and bruised my elbo. I'm glad no one saw mw do that. Even though, number two son said that, "he would have paind money to see that."

Just as I expected, no sympathy what so ever. You have to admitt that, seeing people fall is funny. You know that, it's pretty funny on television shows like, America's Funnyiest Home videos. I'm just glad that no one had a video camera. However, we might have made some money on my accident. See ya'll later.

THEIR BREAK BROKE ME

2006-03-20T05:12:00.000-08:00

For those who happen to be, a stay-at-home parent like I am, you'll understnd this. Spring Break, is just a brief reminder of, how annoying you're kids are all Summer long. I had the opportunity of being around all three of my sons, all week long. By the time yesterday evening came, I was selfishly ready, for my step-sons to go back to their mother's. Not only was I painting all week long, but I was doing all of the other normal things as well. Such as, cooking, cleaning, and laundry. I forgot what, doing laundry for five people was like.

I also didn't realize, just how much food three growing boys can eat. I went through two normal weeks of food, in just one week. I honestly don't know, how my step-son's mother does it with four kids at home. I'll admitt it, I'm spoiled. I have only one kid home, most of the time, my son. Also, the changing clothes three times a day, has got to stop. Not to mention, my step-son's domestic inabilitys. I've always said it, you've got to train children early. If you don't, they will grow up to be sloppy pigs. I'm not saying that, my son is perfect. However, he is far neater then his brothers.

Then again, you also have "the three factor." Together, they are a well oiled "mess machine." I know that, boys are messier then girls. Although, I wanted to kill them all, on several different occasions. Try recleaing, after they have cleaned. I mean, what's the point? When you just have to go over, what they've already done. I this seriously, what you call a good job? Don't you love, telling you're kids to do the same things over and over? I'll probably tell them do clean up their mess on my death bed. I'm serious, otherwise if I don't, it will never get done. They will just say, "who cares, she's dead now anyway."

Here's my favorite of all this week. Everything said, was made into something nasty. Like... you said sack, or tool. Let me see, oh... douche bag, is my all time favorite. Let me put it into a sentence for you. What are ya, stupid or something... ya douche bag? Or what about, "fatty." Everyone is fat, no matter if they are or not. Here's an oldy, but a goody,... fag. Did you know that, you can use the word fag, in almost every sentence? If you don't like something, or someone, it's gay. I nearly died yesterday, when I hear number two son say that, number one son "butt ***** him." I thought, what in the hell! Number one son, was just pretending to hump, number two son. How distrubed are these people anyway!

I know what you're thinking. How did my children get this way, and what are you going to do about it. Well, probably not all of it, is our fault. They do have other parents, and outside influences. By the way, you would never hear the phrase, "butt ****" come out of my mouth. As for the name calling, I know when to put a stop to it, when they've gone too far. The teasing, and making fun of, I put a stop to yesterday. Calgone, take me away! I'm going to take a much needed morning nap. Bye ya'll!

GETTING WOSE ALL OF THE TIME

2006-03-14T05:15:00.000-08:00

Yesterday evening, our number one son called from his Mother's house. He wanted to know if, he could come over a few days early. Evidentally, his Mother was driving him crazy. More like, she's finally losing her mind. More so, then usual. You remember how it was when you were 14 years old? All you wanted to do was, hang out with your friends. Since you didn't have a driver's license, it was your parents job to take you to them. This is becoming a point of contention with, my Step-Son, and his other parents. His other parents as I call them, are his Mom and Step-Dad.

Both are extreamly lazy, and cheap. They don't want to take him anywhere. His Step-Dad has already informed him that, he is going to have to start getting rides from other people. His Mother is so flakey that, she lies to him frequently about, deciding wheather or not, he can go somewhere with his friends. The worst part of all is that, she is coming up with stupid reasons why he can't go places like the movies. Like the most recent excuse, "there is too many germs there." Number two son actually called her on this one. He claims that, one day she will say he can go somewhere, and the next, she will use a lame exccuse.

I guess that, his reply of late is, "why do you lie?" Her response is, "I don't lie, I just change my mind." Here's an idea, just tell the boy that, you've changed you're mind. They were out in the front yard discusssing of this yesterday afternoon. She finally blows up at him and says, "quit pestering me and, just go to your Dad's." He thought, well... alrighty then. He went straight inside, called us, and made arrangements to do so. By the way, I would NEV...ER tell my son, "just go to your Dad's" In fact, I'd pay good money for him not to go over there. Considering that, he's not the best role model for my son.

The bottom line is, our number two son, called her bluff this time. My husband picked him up at the movie theater, after the movie was over last night. He had gone with his girl friend, and a bunch of other kids. My husband always said that, this day would come. The boys would finally get sick of her "crap" as he puts it. They would also see just how crazy she is. He has calimed for years that, all we would have to do it wait. I overheard part of my husabnd's conversation with number two son yesterday. He said, "now you know why I dovorced her?"

So the new question at hand is, will I be raising one, two, or three children in the near future? I think that, it would be great to have all three under our roof where they belong. Six years ago, I would have rather died then admitt that. Then again, I was just trying to keep my new marriage in one piece. Also, I was selfishly in no mood to parent, someone else's kids. I still had my own son to worry about. I still have him to worry about. It's odd what maturity will do to a person. Keep it real ya'll!

BACK AT IT

2006-03-13T05:14:00.000-08:00

I've probably got to be crazy, However, I'm back at it, painting the house. After resting for two weeks or so, I decided that, I had better get busy again. Although, I'm painting the living room this time. Unfortunately, it's taking more coats of paint, then I thought it would. I'm even going with a darker color this time. I think that, the builders, who built our house, should be shot. I have found that, the dry wall was not prepped correctly. Therefore, the walls are acting like a sponge.

My husband, is not at all crazy about my color choices. He keeps saying, "I'll just have to see it when it's done." Yes, I'm sure that, Gumball red and Olive green sounds horrible. I'm just keeping with my Italian theme. I thought that he would be happy. Understanding that, he's 3/4 Italian. Here's the deal, when you don't help paint, you don't get a vote. Besides, it's my house anyway. Not really, I'm just being mean. Don't you know that, most women, decide how the interior home decore will look. So again, I'm going to be busy for the next couple of weeks or so. I've got to get busy. Bye ya'll.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME

2006-03-11T05:18:00.000-08:00

Today is my Birthday. I was born in 1970, so you do the math. Last night, I had a lovely, uneventful dinner with my fmaily and friend. The only bad thing was, they sat part of my family at a table across from us. Therefor, we didn't get an opportunity to visit. They also didn't go to my parents for cake either. Such is life, you can't have it all. However, I got a lot of nice gifts. My Dad was in the odd giving mood, and gave both my Husband and Brother some family antiques.

Hey, "it's not their Birthday", as my Husband put it. I asked my Husband if, "my dad was getting ready to die or something?" He said, "no, he just wanted to I guess." It's alright, no one stole my thunder. Anyway, I'm going back to bed. It's my Birthday, I can do that don't you know? Happy Birthday to all of those wonderful people, who are celebrating their Birthday today too.

OLDER THEN DIRT

2006-03-10T05:23:00.000-08:00

Today is my dad's Birthday, he is 72 years old. I know what you're thinking. Your Dad is as old as my Grandparents. There's a reason for that. My parents had been married for 15 years, when I was born. Actaully, they had nothing to do with my birth. Both my brother and I were adopted. Although, that's a whole other story in itself. I'm just actually happy that, he's made it this long. Not that he's in bad health or anything. It's just that, The Grim Reeper has been busy lately. I'm not going into that, on such a festive day.

Can you imagine being born in 1934, and living through the depression era? If I have to do without just the simplest things, it makes me crazy. What about all of the food and gas rationing, that took place back then. I suppose that, it's no different then today. We do that, on a weekly basis. You know, pay check Friday. We've all been there. Heck, I'm still there. Although, our prioritys have changed. Remember the rationing that took place when we were younger? Well... if I can do without this, I'll still have money to go to the bar tonight. Don't even pretned like you didn't do it! Unless, you've been living under a rock for the past 10 years or so.

I don't know, maybe your stupid days of youth, goes back farther then that. However, I won't tell you how far mine go back. You'll have to wait until tomorrow, to do the math. Unless you know me that is. Yes... my dreaded Birthday is tomorrow! All I will say for today is, I am now in my late 30's. Never-the-less, I hope that I reach my dad's age. By then I'll have half grown grandchildren running around. God Forbid That Ever Happening! I've begged my boys not to get married, or have any kids. Yes... that's another whole story in itself too. Anyway, I've got to call my dad. See ya'll!

MY MOTHER CYBIL

2006-03-09T04:51:00.000-08:00

Currently, both of my parents are 71 years old. Actually, my Dad will be 72 years old tomorrow. In my Mom's case, it seems as though her age, is playing a major role in her behavior. As both my Brother and I were growing up, she was always one to speak her mind. However, the older that she get's, the more abundent her opinions become. It's not so much the frequency of her opinions that bother me, it's how she states them. I starting to feel that, with age, you lose your ability to use tact. Either that, or she just doesn't care anymore.

Maybe because I'm her daughter, she feels as though, she can express her opinions to me, any way that she feels like it. It's almost like knowing someone who is either, going through the change of life, someone who is bipolar, or someone who has mulitple personalitys. I understand that, my Mother's past medical problems, probably contribute to her mood swings. She had breast cancer several years ago, and can nolonger take harmone. From what I understand, this makes you terribly moody. However, this is no excuse to treat the ones you love, with little or no respect.

My main problem with her is, she will call over here, having briefly flown off of the handle. I get pelted with, her unsolicited opinions, and acusations. Sunday, I believe it was, she called here accusing me of, inviting several people to our Birthday dinner. With the expectations that, she and Dad would pay for it all. I never once hoped, suggested, or implyed that. I had to convince her of this. Honestly, it's like having a spoiled child in the family. I expressed to my dad that, he needs to talk to her about doing this all of the time. I hope that he will.

To demonstrate what I'm talking about. Yesterday afternoon, she came over with an outfit that she had purchased for me. I'm guessing that, this was her way of making up to me. Either that or, she didn't even realize that, she had done anything wrong in the first place. So, if you knock on my font door and are selling crazy, we're not buying. We have plenty here already. Later on ya'll freaks.

DYING OF EMBARRASSMENT

2006-03-08T05:15:00.000-08:00

In previous posts, I've talked about our middle "hairy Child." Tigger, our other Boxer puupy, is now 11 months old. He's a wonderful companion for our family. However, he's got just one terrible habbit. He jumps all over our guests, when they come in. My neighbor across the street, came over yesterday to visit the dogs. She has three Westies of her own. She has said before that, she likes dogs, more then people. I tend to agree with her. Dogs aren't quite as annoying as people. Sure, they can be disgusting and a pain in the behind. Although, they love you no matter what.

When she came through the door, Tigger was so happy to see her. He bounced and jumped all over her. This is how, he was named Tigger, from early on. He is very much like Tigger. Luckily, she is very understanding and knowledgeable on the misbehavior of dogs. She and her mother have raised, trained, and showed dogs for years. During her visit, we talked about obiedence school for Tigger. Little did she not that Monday, he chewed up the obiedience school calender from Pet Smart, that was hanging on the refrigerator door. I'm guessing that, he did not want to attend that class.

At first, we didn't know who was responsible for, both the shredded newspaper and purple obideience schedule scattered on the floor. It could have been his little sister Noel too. Although, with the soggy strand of News Paper hanging from his mouth, that was a dead give away. My husband said, "Gee, I wonder who did that?" Needless to say but, he got his butt busted for that. Anyway, I followed my neighbor across the street. She loaned my two books about dog training. Yeah right, like this is going to work. I think that, Tigger is entirely too hard headed to lean how to behave at this point.

He even managed to act up when, both my Sister and Brother-In-Law came over later. Luckily, my Sister-In-Law said, "let him back in, I don't care if he knocks me down, I can handle it." They have two dogs of their own as well. They both kept kneeing him in the chest, until he quit jumping. Until my Brother-In-Law started playing with him rough again that is. At that point, he knew that, he was getting what he deserved. He plays with their American Bulldog like that too. Anyway, I am praying that there is hope for Tigger's future. Maybe one day, he will calm down. See ya'll later on.

LEO THE KIND HEARTED LION

2006-03-07T05:21:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, we attended the funeral of our dear friend's father. Leo's funeral, was one of the strangest thus far. I enjoyed the slide show, and heart felt storys. Both of which, made everyone laugh. The old pictures, showed both he and his wife with; the old hair-do's and clothes. The storys told of, how he was an entrepreneur, terrible carpenter, jokester, and big Oklahoma University fan. All of which were true.

The funnyest of all was when, our freind ended his speach. He said, "I hope that, this doesn't offened anyone, and then said, pull my finger." We found out later that, he had also carried an electronic fart machine with him to the podium. Although, it did not go off after he said it., He decided that, he better not to try it again, since everyone had already laughed.

Even though, I had only known our friend's parents for, as long as I've known my husband. I must say that, it was the most tearless funerals that, I've ever seen. I suppose that, everyone was just cried out. I'm hoping so anyway. Then again, he had been very ill, and everyone was expecting his death. In my opinion, the saddest thing of all was, he died two days before his 55th Wedding Anniversary to his wife. He was also born the day after Christmas. The Minister said, in reference to him passing at that time was "that's just the way he did things."

During the funeral, the casket was closed. However, at the end of the funeral, they let everyone view him. My Husband did his normal thing. He went the other way. He does not like to see the deceased. He says that, he wants to remember them, the way they were. Before they were sick, and looked like themself. I will admitt that, Leo did not look like himself. There in the casket, lay a much older, thinner, bearded man, without his glasses.

In reference to that, my husband sort of mocked me. He said, "you see, now... that's the last memory you'll have of him." What can I say, but he's right. Although, I was just only following with tradition, in paying my respect to our friend and his family. Anyway, take it slow Leo, and tell all that, I said hello. Later on Leo!

EASILY AMUSED

2006-03-04T07:23:00.000-08:00

You know that you're getting old when, the simplest things, make you happpy. Here's what I'm talking about. For the last three mornings in a row, there has been no "puppy poo" on the strategically placed news papers. I never said that, there wasn't any pee pee. Yes... there ws planty of that. But hey... it was on the news paper. So, I'll take what I can get. Noel is only 10 weeks old now. I'm hoping that, she's on the down hill slide to getting potty trained.

Although, after my Husband left for work, "the puupy poop hit the fan." She shred the news paper, and then... well... you know. By the way, never get too preoccupied, when you're on the phone. She left a nice one on my bed room floor. My Husband, was just bragging to me about her on the phone, just minutes ago. I didn't have the heart to tell him that, she's had two accidents since then. That's the thing about married life. Sometimes you've just got to know when to keep your mouth shut.

Having said that, I must be out of my mind. I've potty trained two puppys in less then a year. We also have her older brother Tigger, who was born from the previous litter. Then, there's good old Winston. He's our nearly four year old Bulldog. He's got a major attitude. However, you too would have an attitude. He's never "had a girlfriend" and still has all of his important "male body parts." If I have to explain that, to any of you. Then you've got some serious problems of your own. Have a happy weekend ya'll.

TOO MANY ALREADY!

2006-03-03T06:02:00.000-08:00

Well... I'm guessing that God is on a rampage or something. Our dearest freind, lost his Father yesterday morning. He had been very ill, and his family was expecting it. So much so that, they had been making Funeral arrangements the day before. However, that doen't make the loss any easier. I keep thinking, wishing rather, that we just have to keep my parents alive this year. Actually, many more to come. It just seems that, death is closing in on us. This is the 5th death of someone close to us since November.

Our wonderful dog maverick died in November. My Mother's best friend, died in November. My Babysitter's Husband, died in January. My Husband's Coworker, died in February. Now our friend's Dad yesterday. I have been asking God to, "slow it down." Appearently, he isn't listening. Is he just doing some "house cleaning" or what? I had no other way of putting it. Never-the-less, I'm sick "TO Death" of hearing about, all of this death. Ya'll take it easy this weekend.

SCARLET'S DRAPES

2006-03-02T05:09:00.000-08:00

I can understand why, Scarlet O'Hara made a new dress out of her livining room drapes. The fabric was beautiful. After almost four years of living here, I finally put up some drapes in the living room last night. Well, it actually wasn't me. My Husband put up the brackets. I suppose that, I could have done that too. There isn't that much that, I can't do. However, he's taller, and better equipted to handle the drill. He had to make new holes, for the new brackets, and screws.

My new drapes are made of, micro fibre and are dark red. Micro fibre is, that fake suade. Never-the-less, they dress the living room up so much. I just have to buy some valances for them today. That's about it, for the redecorating update. Happy redecorating ya'll.

FRIEND SURVEY

2006-03-01T05:01:00.000-08:00

Appearently, my friend sent me an E-Mail last night entitled "Friend Survey." It had 16 questioins, but was pretty interesting. Things like, Where did we meet, Take a stab at my Middle name, and Do I believe in God? I think that, I got them all right, regarding my friend. I hope that, I got atleast 1/2 of them right. Otherwise, that would be embarrassing. My Husband, on the other hand, is much more attentive then I. He would probably do better at this Survey, regarding his friends. The botton line is, he pays more attention then I do. We'll see how my Surverys trun out later. Bye ya'll.

NO ETIQUETTE

2006-02-28T08:50:00.000-08:00

Earlier this morning, I posted a question to Yahoo Questioins regarding, the name of my Generation according to the year. Soon after, I searched the Web, and answered my own question. Never-the-less, I received a few answers. All of which were wrong, I may add. However, one individual was very rude. This individual, referred to me as "Bub" while belittling me at the same time. I understand that, my Husbands name is on the account, and probably came up as the screen name. His exact response was, "I thing that you've got it all wrong...Bub."

How rude was that? You don't know the person fron Adam that, you are responding to. It could have been anyone. I posted to all of those interested that, I answered my own question, and scolded the rude individual at the same time. I hope that, he or she get's embarrassed, after they read my reply. FIND SOME MANNERS PEOPLE... FOR GOD'S SAKE! Later ya'll.

BIG LITTLE BROTHER

2006-02-27T05:10:00.000-08:00

Saturday, my younger Brother turned 35 years old. I call him my younger Brother because, We're only 11 and 1/2 months apart. For two weeks, we are the same age. Yes, that means my Birthday will be here shortly. I will be 36 years old this year. I am officaially in my late 30's, and on the down hill slide to 40. I'm sure that, my Husband doesn't even want to here it. He will actually be 40 in September.

We were all sitting around Saturday evening at dinner talking about that. He claims that, he does not want me to "do it up big."
I threatened to get a couple of midget strippers for his party. He said, "then I'll just have them wear clown suites and chase you around." Both of which he knows that, I have a fear of, clowns, and midgets. I would actually just, fall over dead, if that ever happened. I'd just fall out, from shear fright.

However, my Brothers Birthday dinner, was pretty uneventful. With the exception of, the two cheap shots that my Dad took at me. He asked me when I was going to get a job, and that I was going to get fat, if I ate a piece of cake. Honestly, I havn't worked in almost three years, and probably never will again. So, he can just get over that. As far as my weight, I weigh 100 pounds even, and have since I was about 15. He tried to smooth that comment over by saying, "I wish that I had you're figure." So in reply, I said "way to support the post Hyterectomy weight gain." I havn't gained any weight by the way.

As far as the snyde remark, which everyone laughed at. I just Said, I'll get a job, when you lose 50 pounds. I know, pretty nasty, but that's all that I could come up with that quick. At that point, he reminded me of, my astranged Father-In-Law. He always managed to start something, at family gatherings. I don't miss that stuff, at...all. I will say that, my Brother looked very disgusted, while sitting on the Birthday Saddle at the steak house restaurnant.

My Husband was just paying him back for, asking the employees to sing to him, and make him wear the Mexican hat. I will never do that, what goes around, comes around. Happy Monday ya'll.

MY CINDERELLA STORY

2006-02-23T05:23:00.000-08:00

I may have my married Price Charming, although I'm still at home cleaning. "No Cinderella... you may not go to the Ball tonight. You have to stay home and scrub the floors." Yes, that's right, it seems that's all that I've been doing since our new puppy arrived. For future reference, never try to potty train a puppy in the Winter time. They would much rather use the potty on the warm ceramic tile floor, then go outside on the cold ground.

In reference to Cinderella's story. My son's youngest step-brother, knocked out the composite of his front tooth Saturday night. Both my Husband and my son's Father said, "accidents happen and boys will be boys." That's a load of crap! That wresteling accident, cost me $ 200.00 out of my pocket to get his tooth repaired. My Husband informed them that, "there will nolonger be any wresteling in the house what-so-ever!" Furthermore, "if you want to wrestle, go outside to do that." He sounded a lot like my Dad back in the day. "The house is not a Gymnasium!" he would say.

If I had the chance, I'd rather be sleeping Beauty. Then again, some stupid prince would just come and wake me up anyway. So what's the point right? It feels as though, I havn't slept in weeks. What was the chicks name, who let down her hair, so that the guy could climb it? Man... I wouldnt have done that either. Number one, I've cut my long hair since then. Number two, my hair cost entirely too much money to let some idiot wreck it, by climbing all over it. Can you imagine the breakage?

Who were they trying to fool anyway? He wasn't trying to save her from being imprisioned. That whole story was just about two people "trying to get their grove on." Dorothy once said, there's no place like home." Who was she kidding? I guess that' she's never visited my house. Ya'll click your shoes together twice.

MAKE THE WORLD GO AWAY

2006-02-22T05:16:00.000-08:00

Just when you think that, you're getting it all together, things change. Not serious things, just "life's stuff." Yesterday, I had to, take middle son to get his chipped tooth fixed, check on new Insurance, accompany my parents to Wal Mart, and take two out of our three dogs to the vet. My Husband informed me that, our Bulldog needs to be "fixed." He has a major attitude problem. I am still not finished, taking care of some minor painting details. However, "the big parts" are complete. Even if I had to paint something else, I don't even have it in me. Too much else, seems to go by the way side.

I actually have, the whole rest of the house to paint. Although, I need a breather. A break away from all of that. There at the end of my painting attempts, everthing that I touched, seemed to "turn to crap." It's probably because, I was trying to hurry things. For Heaven's Sake... make the oh so boaring Olympics go away. My favorite Aunt, had a heart-related procedure yesterday. I hope that, she will be fine. My Husband, attended a funeral yesterday. A coworker passed away last week. The whole funeral thing, needs to cease as well. That's the third one, since November. Lastly, out puupy is wearing me thin. Jeez Louise, I'm going to take a morning nap. Ya'll take a break too.

Winter... Wonder Why?

2006-02-17T05:40:00.000-08:00

It's finally feeling like Winter here in Oklahoma. Not quite a Winter Wonderland, just cold. There's a possibility of snow and sleet here this weekend. Both of which, I'm not looking forward to. I actaully hate Winter to be honest with you. It makes my bones ache, and it always has. Being an indoor stay-at-home Mom, I'm not aclamted to the cold. Then again, I never have have been. I've always weighed no more then 100 punds, since I was 14 years old. With not much meat on my bones, I get cold easily.

I really felt bad for my Husband this morning, having to brave the cold. I'll bet delivering the mail, will stink today. I'm guessing that, he will get a move on, and do it quickly. However, that's why they get paid well to do so. Meaning that, they have to endure all sorts of weather while delivering the mail. Although, the first few hours of his day, are spent in the office. That's a good thing. Ya'll stay warm today.

100 DAILY BITCHES

2006-02-16T05:13:00.000-08:00

Today, marks my 100th Blog entry. I started my Blog this past August, and have really enjoyed myself. My Husband completely objects to me doing so. He feels that, people are finding out too much about me. He also thinks that, two particular people of interst, are also reading my Blog on a daily basis. I know this because, they have reacted to a couple of my entrys. I really don't care if they are. Maybe, they will start to understand me. However, they are just so shallow that, they could use my published thoughts against me.

Although, my intent when I started this Blog, was only for my personal therapy. Having said that, my Blog may often be boaring. Again, it has given me an opportunity to vent my feelings, frustrations, and tell my storys. Not too many people have ever commented on it, but that's ok I don't need validation. Anyway, I've got to get busy. Ya'll take it easy.

V.D.

2006-02-15T05:14:00.000-08:00

Our friend calls me yesterday and says, "Happy VD!" All I could do was laugh, and say was "VD..., sorry, I don't have any VD." Most of our friends aren't right in the first place. That's probably why their our friends. As for Valentins Day, it was pretty uneventful. My Husband and I, exchanged our gifts last Thursday I believe. We gave our middle son his gifts yesterday morning. My Mom and Dad, stopped by our house yesterday evening to do the same.

Never-the-less, Valentines Day is clearly a holiday for the card and candy makers. We should be able to tell, or show our loved ones that we love them without a holiday. Hope ya'll did something intersting for your VD... Valentines day that is.

NEED A SLOW DOWN

2006-02-14T06:57:00.000-08:00

I havn't completely vanished, I've just been busy. Painting the kitchen is almost completed. However, I've made a big mess of the corwn molding, and the base boards. It's going to take a lot of paint remover, to make it look good again. I havn't painted in years, and I no better then I was years ago. I guess I'm using too much paint around the painters tape. I guess I'll have to call the expert, my step-son's step dad. What a mess! I think I'm finished with painting for a while. See ya'll later.

JUST THE ESSENTIALS

2006-02-09T05:10:00.000-08:00

Once again, I'm back to feeding three dogs. I have to go to the store today, to replinish my dog food supply. I now have to buy, both puppy and adult food. Not to mention, I need puppy pee pads. These are a new necessity to me. I wish that, I would have known about these, when I was potty training Tigger. I was just using paper towel and news paper. They are far more absorbant. Actually, I need to get more from the store then just dog items. I'm going to have quite a cart full today. I must not forget my Valentine gifts. I'm sure that I won't, they are on my list too. Take it easy ya'll!

OH... WHAT A RUSH

2006-02-08T05:07:00.000-08:00

If there ever was a time when I realized that, I'm far too busy to wrok, it was today. The first 30 minutes of the mornings, aren't my own. I have this entire regiment, that I have to go through. My list is as follows. # 1. Wake my son. #2. Let the boy dogs out. # 3. Start the coffee. # 4. Move the dog beds out of the kitchen, into the living room. # 5. Take my pill and vitamins. # 6. Give Tigger his vitamin. # 7. Give both dogs their allergy pills. # 8. Feed the boy dogs. # 9. Feed Noel, the little girl puppy. # 10. Take Noel out to potty. # 11. Make sure that my son takes his vitamins. # 12. Pour the coffe for both my Husband and I. # 13. Get my orders of what my Husband, would like me to do for today. # 14. Make a mental game plan of the day in my head.

I can't imagine having to take a shower, dress, put on make-up, do my hair, eat and drink coffe in the midst of all this. No wonder people have maids/house keepers. My Mom and Dad are retired, and have one. I honestly need one, until I finsh painting. Lord knows when that will be. Take it slow ya'll!

TO APPRECIATE IT...

2006-02-07T05:20:00.000-08:00

They say that, to appreciate something, you have to do without it first. I'm starting to feel that way, about my beloved sleep. I didn't realize just how important it was to me, until I had to do without it for a few days. So far, Noel our new puppy has slept through two whole nights. The first night with the little lamp, and last night without it at all. I'm guessing that, she realizes that everyone else is still asleep, and just goes back to sleep herself. Good for her!

I'm starting to get my house back in order. The anxienty related chest pains, have started to subside as well. I tend to get overwhelmed, when the house isn't perfect. I realize that, I'm obsessive compulsive. However, I can't help it. After all, my your only job is, taking care of my house and my family. Again, I will get the painting finished one of these days. I actually knew that, it would take me a good two weeks to complete this task. That's what happens when, life get's in the way. Have a productive day ya'll!

SCRIPTED CHAOS

2006-02-06T10:18:00.000-08:00

Hello... I'm back... For anyone who might care, I've been a little preoccupied. Out new addition arrived Thursday afternoon. My Husband brought out new puppy home Thurday afternoon. He said that the Breeders were going to keep her an extra week, since she was the smallest one. I hate using the word or phrase, "Runt Of The Litter." However, I guess that she is. Although, my Husband has been fibbing for me for about two weeks now, regarding the Puppy Noel. He had been carefully plotting this secret homcoming, just so that he could suprise me. Guess what, it worked!

Our lives have not been the same since she got here. It is honestly like having a newborn. Neither of us has gotten much sleep since she arrived. It's just like a human babay. You have to get up frequently to feed, water, and let her out. I thought that, it was 1994 all over again. That's the year when my son was born. Don't get me wrong, I have been unpatiently awaiting her arrival. I could not wait until she got here. Although, she was quite a sight when my Husband walked in with her Thursday afternoon. She is so terribly tiny for just six weeks old. I took her to Vet's Office on Friday. When he weighed her, she only weighed 2.4 pounds.

Noel also had a touch of Ring Worms. This could also be a contributing factor to her size and weight. I'll bet getting bounced off of Momma, when you were trying to nurse was not fun either. The Breeders said that, they paid special attention to her as far as feeding and nursing. Never-the-less, it didn't help much in this instance. The other crazy thing going on in my world is, I'm painting our kitchen. I actually went out and bought paint and all of the necessitys last Sunday. Little did I know that, it was going to take me two weeks to finish a simple project.

The other thing that happened is, another very dear friend of the family died one week ago last Friday. Our Babysitter's Husband in Indianapolis unexpedly passed away of a massive heart attack. She was I and my Brother's Babysitter for about 10 years. Our family and theirs were so very close. My Brother somehow managed, to get time away fom his job, to go to the funeral. He was our Family's representative if you will. Another friend of my parents died that weekend as well. He owned a store in Branson Missouri, and was shot by an angry customer. My life lately seems to be, two steps forward, and three steps back. It's crazy ya'll!

DOG GONE SCARY

2006-02-02T05:01:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I took both of my dogs to the vet. I thought that, the morning cough that they have had for the past week, might be serious. I didn't know if, they just had a cold, or something worse. After all, my neighbors Bulldog died this past October, from a mucous-related asfixiation. I wasn't quite as worried about my Boxer, as I was my Bulldog. I didn't want to find him out in the yard, the same way my neighbors did. They warned me after their dog died, "if you think that your dog had allergys, go take him to get his shots, or whatever." They felt really guilty for not doing so.

However, my dogs only have weather-related allergys. We have had a really mild Winter here thus far. My Vet said that, we have been seeing a lot of dogs lately for this very same reason. I was almost doing the right thing for the dogs. I was giving them one Benedril and not two, like my Vet suggested. I gave them two last night before bed. They woke up this morning, with no cough. I just so happens that, I paid $40.00 for my Vet to tell me that my dogs have allergys, and gave me no medicine. He just advised me, to go and get some more Benedril. Crazy, isn't it ya'll?

ALL THAT IS OLD...

2006-02-01T05:18:00.000-08:00

As I've said, my Son and I are repainting the kitchen. It is going very slow, because it's only me painting during the day. I didn't seem to get uch done yesterday, because of all of my other errands. The same will go for today. I have to take the dogs to the vet, they both have a cough. I also have to both refill perscriptions, and switch pharmacys. Thankfully, my Son is helping me. He's actually neater then I am, when it comes to painting. I seem to ber very sloppy. Kind of like, let's hurry and get it done.

The clean, beautiful paint, is coming along very nicely. Again, my Son keeps saying, I can't wait until it's gone. I think that, my Husband feels the same way. This is because, the kitchen is torn up. Furthermore, we are all eating on the coffee table in the living room, in front of the TV. Hey, atleast we're all together... right? Again, I will enlist the help oh my two Step-Sons this weekend. Should I not be finished that is. Never-the-less, all of the redecorating is killing me. However, all that is old, is new again. Se ya'll.

SHE WENT POSTAL

2006-01-31T05:07:00.000-08:00

My Husband, has been a mail carrier for over 13 years now. He, as well as his fellow carriers, go through many ups and downs. From legitimately injuring themselves on the job. To faking an injury, just to get some time off. Carrying mail, is one thing that, I could never do. I tell my Husband that, I could never do his job, even if I tried. Yes... they are paid very well to carry mail. They have sick leave, weeks of vacation, and full benefits. However, consider all of the things that they have to put up with in doing so. My Husband tells me that, it get's harder and harder to carry mail each year.

He means that, the Supervisiors are told from "The Higher Ups" what numbers are to be run on the Mail Carriers. For instance, it should take you so long to case you're route, as well as carry it. If you are either long or short in doing so, they will be sure to tell you. My Husband's favorite Mail Customers are those, who ask "are you sure that's all of my mail?" Thye are actually looking for their Government Assistance check. Yet, I digress. These points were made, in order to prepare you for the News Story that we saw this morning.

Yet another Carrier, in California went crazy. She shot many of her fellow carriers, then turned the gun on herself. My Husband is going to tell his Supervisior about this, sometime this morning.
Meaning that, "if you keep pushing us, with all of these senseless rules and regulations" we might turn on you. Ya'll appreciate your Mail Carriers!

COLOR ME TIRED

2006-01-30T05:07:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I got the stupid idea that, I would go to Lowe's to get house paint. Interior house paint that is. Our home is only seven years old. However, the paint inside our house, is as old as well. Again, they must have used the cheapest paint that they could find. If you rub a smudge off of the wall, the paint will come off too. Also, the paint has chipped off of the base borards in the bathrooms. You can't even get a mop anywhere near the base boards, without the paint coming off.

It was actaully Saturday when I decided that we needed to paint. I was returning the kitchen trash can, and the large, plastic dry dog food contained to it's normal palce. This is when I saw huge paint chips gone from behind both of these containers. Gee... that looks cute I thought. I am also out of touch up paint, now what? Hey... I know, we can paint. No... here's one better, I can paint. I'll never get any help fom anyone else around here. I also bought a crackle paint kit for, the boys bathrooms sink cabinets.

I thought that, I should start small, before I tear up the whole kitchen. Number two son did help me with that, when he got back from "The Doner's House." I guess that, kids don't mind helping to paint. It's brobably actually kind of fun or something. Two tiny caninets are fun, a whole kitchen is not. So... I decided to go very pale yellow in the kitchen. I picked this color because, I collect blue and white decorative plates that hang on the wall. It sounds ugly, but it will look beautiful.

My plan is, to get rid of all of the peanut butter color paint, that is throughout the entire house. My Sister-In-Law, just painted a room in their house this color. However, after over three years of looking at peanut butter, I am tired of looking at it. Well, I've got to get busy ya'll.

MORE BAD NEWS

2006-01-28T08:22:00.000-08:00

Last night, my Bother was over delivering my "old divorce papers." My Attorney lives next door to him. She had said, while I was in there a couple of weeks ago; "I'll take them next door when I'm finished with them." Anyway, my Bother, Husband and I were visiting when the phone rang. I looked at the Caller ID Box, and notice that, it was a very close childhood friend of ours. His Mother babysat us in her home, along with a million different other kids, for about 10 years or so. Sam is actuyally my age, but stayed in better contact with my Brother.

I guess guys have a tendency to do that. However, I felt it strange that he call me, he never had before. Then again, he's only had my home phone number since this past Christams Eve. I just happened to answer my Brother's cell phone, and it was Sam.
My Brother thought he'd be funny and answer our phone for us. My Bother's laughter quickly faded, and his face sort of fell.

The next thing that I heard was "Man... I'm so sorry." Well, all of us grown ups know what that means. Yep... someone has died. That is the adult answer, when we don't know what else to say, and to give our immediate respect. My Bother quickly mouthed to me, "His Dad died." I was certainly shocked to hear that. I was just wondering if they were back in Indianapolis, or back in Florida at their winter home.

My Brother then hands the phone over to me, but first says "Beth wants to talk to you." I find out the gist of what happened. He had been back and fourth to bed all morning. Although, when some friends came by after breakfast, he decided to get dressed and get up. Appearently, that only lasted a short while. He decided to go back to bed. At this point Barbara had been checking on him every 10 to 15 minutes. However, when she got there the last time, she could tell that he was gone by the way he was laying.

She gave him CPR until the Paramedics got there. Sam said that, they worked on him for an hour, but to no avail. Sam said that, I thought that we had him until atleast 80 or 86. Telling me that, this was the average age of an adult male. My mom said that, she thinks that he was about 75 years old. I'm sure that his Funeral Arrangements will take some doing. He will have to be released from the Coroner's Office in Florida, then be flown back to Indianapolis before they can have the Funeral. Ya'll pray for them!

BROTHERLY LOVE

2006-01-27T05:06:00.000-08:00

I'll never understand this. However, the one person who I thought was polar opposite from me, really isn't. That person is, my brother. I'm not sure if, our likenesses stems from any of the following. Maybe it's that, we are both selifish and stubborn. Possibly becasue, we shared the same parents. It could be that, we're both adopted and spoiled. I suppose that, we could be suffering from some dysfunction. Our just proudly that, we suffered through and survived, the wrath of our parents upbringing.

It seems as though, our Mother has been sitting on "The Pitty Potty." It's true, both she and our Dad only live three minutes from me. You would think that, I'd be over there every day. Wrong, I really hadn't spent in serious time over there since New Year's Day, when she made dinner for all of us. My Dad brought this to my attention, via my son. He called last night, with a pittiful attempt to get his point across. Something like, "I just wanted to talk to you becasue, I havn't seen any of you for a while."

Wow... could you just trun and twist the knife in, a little more? That was a cheap shot, I must say. You know, using my son and all.
I suppose that, it wan't intentional though. So... shortly there after, I called my Mom to see if she wanted to tag along to Wal Mart with me tomorrow. She said no, then started with the crying, interrogation, and guilt. I tried to counter back with, "well you never come over here either." If you never learn anything about me, you'll soon find that, I'm stubborn and will not be guilted into anything.

I then called my Brother, to tell him of this needless conversation. I said that, "since she metioned your name too, I thought I'd tell you that, "she's on a rampage." I told him of what, she said. She said that, "D wouldn't know if we had been dead for six months, unless someone told him." This is when he said, "I've got half a mind to take my butt back to Indiana." I said, "can I go too?" This is because, we were both bron and raised in Indiana. However, we havn't lived there in over 21 years.

I then jokingly raised the point that, "this is why people put their parents in nursing homes." She informed me that, I could come by more because, "I don't have that much to do." Yes, even though I don't work away from the home, I just sit around all day. I said that, "I'm just busy with the house and kids." She said, "only every other weekend." She means that, I only have all three of our boys, every other weekend. She forgets that, I don't have a housekeeper to clean my house like she does. Furthermore, she has two small dogs, and I have to bigger, younger, wilder dogs.

Again, my Dad could care less if, she doesn't cook every night. My Husband tends to like fresh, hot meals after he gets home from work. I also have to do the laundry, and iron for three people. My Mom doesn't iron anything. I told her that, you are either at the Dr.'s office, at the store, or are with your friends. She said, "I have to go do things with my friends, I get bored and can't just sit around here." It's one of those, damned if you do, damed if you don't situations. I try to not need them for any thing, and this is what I get. I suppose that, she's just feeling not needed. She needs to make up her mind.

When I was getting ready to hang up the phone with my brother I said, "well... I need to get off here and go back to ironing my kids school clothes." Then I asked, "do you know why?" He replyed, "because you don't have anything else to do." At first, I had half a mind to go straight over there early today, bearing flowers or something. However, again, I won't be guilted into anything. Good luck with ya'll's folks this weekend!

HELP FROM MY COUSIN

2006-01-26T05:17:00.000-08:00

I have gathered the troops, so-to-speak. My very distant cousin, whom I've never met, is going to assist me. She is a far better genealogy researcher then I'll ever be. You should this this wonderful Family web site that she put together, about our family. I suppose that, this takes time and even money. Both of which, I don't have any of. Again, she was very floored, when she read my story about my Husband's Mother. Her exact words were, "I'm speechless."

Never-the-less, I gave her every detail that I had about my Mother-In-Law. I all but scanned every document that I had. No... not really. I just included every detail, in the one E-mail to her. She'll probably be overwhelmed when she read's it. She'll probably have to make a time line with dates on it. So... we'll see how this truns out. I'm excited to see what she will find. Se ya'll!

RESTING IN PEACE

2006-01-25T05:03:00.000-08:00

In reading some of my previous posts; you may be familar with all of the genealogy research that I have been doing. All of which, is in regards to my Mother-In-Law. I still call her my Mother-In-Law, even though we never met. I realize that, I should be calling my Husband's Step-Mother, my Mother-In-Law. However, after our astrangement, I can nolonger do that. I also understand that, she did raise both he and his sister, and their half sister. It still makes no sense to me to do so. My reason being, I feel that she did so, out of a sense of obligation.

Again, that is all "water beneath the bridge." It's amazing how, the emotional scares that you're parents give you, never seem to heal. I also find it amazing how, some of us who had rough beginnings, are still here and entacted emotionally. I've said that, we all should be far worse off then we are. However, we've somehow overcame the odds. I'm not speaking of myself so much. I was just simply put up for adoption at birth, and given a better life.

Never-the-less, while watching TV in bed last night, I asked my Husband a question. I said, do you think that, you Mom is at rest? At first, he said, "no." The reason he gave was, because of how tragicly she died. Then, changed his answer to, "yes... probably" and that, "she's probably over it, and may be reincarnated or something by now." I thought, if anyone could sense that either way, it would be him.

I was guessing that, the Mother/Child bond is forever. Also that, this is something that the test of time can never erase. He has also said before that, "she's my guardian angel." I suppose that I believe him. Tell ya'll's Mom that you love them today!

A FAMILAR VOICE FROM THE GRAVE

2006-01-24T05:03:00.000-08:00

Yesterday afternoon, I got quite a suprise in the mail. I had completely forgotten that, a Massachusetts Genealogist was doing some research for me. I'll bet that, it's been two months since I've talked to George. So long that, I had forgotten anyway. Never-the-less, he found two more articles about, my husband's long since deceased Mother. We have recieved about four or five other articles in the past year. However, these two, are both altogether different.

One of those articles, even had a small picture of her in it. The other article, named every Police Detective, and Medical Personel, that worked on her Murder case. George informed me that, he knew that a cople of those Detectives were dead. I suppose from News Paper articles that he had seen in the past. Otherwise, he would have tried to contact them himself, he said.

To my suprise, I personally found out that, more then a couple were dead. I ran all of the names that were included in the big article, through the Social Security Death Index. Can you believe that, "all of them mentioned were dead?" Yes, all of the Police Detectives, and Medical Personel. I guess I shouldn't be shocked. Her murder happened in November of 1972. Furthermore, it remains a "Cold Case."

To be honest, I am completely disgusted with both the Massachusetts State Police Department, and the Chelsea Police Department. In the past, they both claimed that the other probably had those Police rerorts. Until yestreday afternoon, when the Chelsea Police Department finally said that, "they probably had been destroyed years ago." The records clerk said that, "you know that we didn't have computer in those days," and that "everything was hand written." No... I just fell off of the Turnip Truck yesterday.
What kind of stupid question was that supposed to be?

My Husband asked me, "how can they just destroy those records, that is still a cold case?" I fully agree, this is somone's parent that we are talking about. I could care less that, they were hand written, and not in a computer data base some where. They should assign someone to do that, beofore they destroy the paper files.
Oddly enough, yesterday was also my astranged Father-In-Law's 64th Birthday. Coinsidence, or was my Mother-In-Law trying to tell me something? I wish that, one day we will find our the truth about her death. Catch ya'll later.

THE TRUTH BE KNOWN

2006-01-23T05:02:00.000-08:00

Last week, our next door neigbors, we're Burglarized. It's not actually a break in, when the front door was left unlocked. Again, my assignement was, to alert the rest of the neighbors on the street. I did that, for the simple reason of, keeping everyone safe. A keep your eyes and ears open kind of a deal. Our street, is a small family, why wouldn't I feel obliged to do so?

This weekend, I was given some news. Some news that, "I was to keep on the down low." An information exchange, if you will. However, I'm completely disguted to find that, one of my neighbors is not who I thought they were. Not only do they bash people behing their backs, but their also dishonest. It seems as thought, someone said that, they were broken into, when they wern't.

That's noting to be making lihgt of. That's almost like saying that, "I won't be able to come to work today, because my Grandmother died." To me, you're just asking for it in the long run. That's a serious Karmic mistake on their part. What I'm saying is, you are all but asking, for that to really happen.

This absolutely makes me crazy! Honest to God, if I knew their insurnace company's, I'd call them. This is exactly why, insurance premimums are so much. It's Jack Asses like my neighbors, who are reporting false claims. This makes eveyone else's insurance premimus so costly. Don't they know that, "INSURANCE FRAUD IS ILLEGAL?" Ya'll are a couple of Jerks!

THEN AND NOW ...Beautifully Written

2006-01-21T11:06:00.000-08:00

Recently, I was reading "just" the profiles of some Blogs that I have been scanning through. It seems as though, most people are going above and beyond, just the basics. How is that, they are so forthcoming with the intimate details of their emotional state. My just simply reads, Married, Mother, College-Educated, Stay-at-home Mom. Simplicity at it's best. Having said that, I've decided to delve further into my "inner psyce." How I got to be, the person I am today. All of the little pieces of what makes me... me.

Let's start from the beginning. I was born in 1970, so obviously I have quite of bit of my Birth Mother's "left over Hippie and Flower Child in me. I was also born in Indianapolis, Indiana, so I've got a little of the nasal accent left. In High School in the late 80's, I dressed very Punk, and listened to that sort of music as well. To tell you the truth, it takes me back, and I still think it's cool. Let's call that, "My Dark Erra." Punk has now been renamed Goth, or Gothic for those just wondering. In the mid 90's when my son was born, I tunred into "The Mommy." So, I toned it down, and decided to dress appropriately. I was also a member of, the "First Wives Club." As if that matters at all now. All of that work, and for what?

While dating my second Husband, I discovered that he was a "Part-Time Hick." He still looks fabulous in those Wranglers I might add! So, I decided not to fight the "Inner Redneck" in me, and bought jeans, boots, and hats. I am so "Cowboy Fashion Conscious" that, I know what hat to wear for what season. Your Black Felt, is for October 1st to April 1st. Your straw hat is to worn from April 1st back to October 1st. However, you may also wear your Black Felt if it is serious dressing up. Also, the more X's on the inside of the the felt, the better the hat. You should also, get your jeans starched heavily by the dry cleaners. They can do it better then you ever will at home. I'm guessing that, Ms. Redneck had been there all along.

When I'm just putting around the house with the dogs and kids, I wear my Levis and an old sweat shirt. My hair is up in a Pony Tail 95% of the time, and my make-up is never on. My husband does not love that look by the way. I have deamed her "The Tom Boy." She's also the one who plays Touch Football with her boys in the front yard. I am very capable of dressing up beautifully, when I need to. My husband calls her "That Girl." Meaning that, he goes to bed with "That Girl" and wakes up with "The Tom-Boy." It's amazing how that happens. So mostly, what reamins is, "The Redneck" and
a "Tom Boy."

"Momma Mia Schofield", is the wife of Mr. Schofield. She showed up, a few years after they were married. Yes, my Husband is 3/4 Italian. His Grand Mother's maiden name was DiTullio. She and her parents, actually came to America from Italy on a boat. I have started learning to speak Italian in the past year or so. I even speak Italian swear words to my kids. I have struggeled with the decision of wheather or not to, convert to Catholicism. I'm starting to become a pretty good Italian cook as well.

The Former "Punk" is nowhere to be found. Both the "Mommy" and "First Wife" are gone too. The "Flower Child" will forever be with me, both in body and spirit. Some traits are just unchangable genetics. You'll see the "Flower Child" mostly in the summer when it's warm. I have learned a lot from her though, she's my free spirit. She's also the "Life's Teacher" to my children.

She has traveled many roads in her search for simplicity and truth. She's also the one who, doesn't freak out about sex and nudity. She could care less if, you take a Pee or Crap in the woods while we're at the Lake. Just watch your shoes... She says, "It's just Nature man" and "Keep On Livin" in her Oklahoma drawl. This accent, took me over 21 years to unconsciously obtain. I'm sure that, there are many other characters who reside within me. However, they do not hang out as much.. See ya'll and all of "your alters" later.

ANOTHER WEEK OF WORRY

2006-01-20T05:19:00.000-08:00

I had my taxes firgured yesterday. Once again this year, I am going for the Rapid Refund. I can't honestly believe that, we're still getting a refund at our age. I suppose that's what happens when, you still have dependents living at home. It's Friday once again, all three of the boys will be with us this weekend... oh joy. Seriously, they aren't that bad. The older they get, the more I can stand them. They are just small adults at this point. Not considered adults to most people. However, if you can speak clearly, take your own bath, use the bathroom by yourself, and feed yourself, you're an adult in my book.

Still no word from my attorney, of how my former husband reacted to "getting served." I'll try to call them once more today. I still have to go by the C.P.A's office, and get grocerys at Wal Mart. It is a never ending cycle, don't you think? Furthermore, it's "Funky Friday", which means the dogs need at bath. They get one every Friday. Speaking of dogs, our new puppy will probably get to come and live with us next week. I will have potty trained two puppys, in less than one year. What am I thinking? Ya'll have a happy Friday.

LOCK IT UP!

2006-01-19T05:02:00.000-08:00

Yesterday monring, my Husband noticed two Police cars next door at the neighbors. This was only after our Boxer Puppy was barking his head off at something. He was actually barking at the water meter reader. However, that was what made him notice the Police cars in their drive way. After the Police left, we called our neighbor. My husband asked, "are you Ok?" She said, "no...come over and I explain." Again, she is divorced, and lives alone with her two High School aged children.

Long story short, the have been robbed during the night. Not exactly broken into either. You can't get broken into, when you accidentally leave the front door unlocked all night. Normally, this is the kind of town, where that never matters. PODUNK... Oklahoma, never has had much trouble with thieves. No... Podunk is not the name of my Hometown either. I just wasn't going to give the real name of it. I have to protect my idenity somewhat.

Anyway, they had stolen $ 50.00 out of her purse, a PDA, a Digital Camera, and their printer to the computer. Strangly enough, the town's Police was already down the street, taking a report. Someone, had set the cab of the neighbors truck on fire. It didn't manage to completely engulf the inside. The fire smothered itself out, after the truck door was shut. Having said that, both my husband and the Police think that, it was the Illegal Aliens from Mexico who are on the loose.

Appearently, their is a dangerous gang from Mexico, who are trying to reside here illegally. The Police in the neighboring town managed to catch a few on Tuesday. However, there are still many that remain uncaptured. So, at my neighbors request, she asked that I alert the neighbors. I did so because, she has only lived here since last November. Quite honestly, they were all stunned to hear the news. Again, this is a small town. Although, I can promise you that, they wouldn't have made it out of our home alive. If you get my meaning. So...ya'll lock it up too.

PROTECT ME PLEASE

2006-01-18T04:37:00.000-08:00

Last Friday, I was so wrong about my E-Husband getting served his "Legal Papers." To get you back up to speed, this was regarding a Visitation Modification. My Attorney's Office, actually served him yesterday. Although, I did not receive any phone calls, E-Mails, or visits. Can you believe, NOT ONE phone call to inquire "just what the hell did I think that I was doing.?" I thought that, I knew how he would react; maybe I don't. However, I'm sure that, he's still the same old "Jack Ass" that he ever was. That... I do know for sure. He's probably actually less than a complete Jack Ass then he use to be. He saves, the Holy Reign Of Terror on me, for his wife.

I will bet that, she hit the fan when she heard about those papers. It is proven that, Control Freaks can't "just not" do something that doesn't envolve them. That's why we're at this point to begin with. She thought that, she could compartmentalize my son. Meaning that, she would just tuck him away somewhere else, every opprotunity she got. If it were just her, her husband, and their daughter; then all would be right with the world. If my son were no where to be found, then he wouldn't effect her life. Wrong... Ya Big Old Hag!

Gosh... it seems as though I'm reverting today. I'm acting like a child. Well, that's ok, it's just you and I. After all, I think that somthing would be really wrong with me if; I didn't think like a child from time to time when I'm injured. We can rationalize all day long that, we're adults. However, sometimes you just want to go back to the Play Ground, and beat the crap out of someone. Thirty Something doesn't make us any less human. Having said all of that, my wonderful Husband will be here today. He will come to my aid, if my Ex-Husband decides to be a jerk. It's Wednesday dinner night for he and my son. See ya'll!

ITALIANO

2006-01-17T05:10:00.000-08:00

Buon giorno... That's good morning in Italian. Yes... I bought an Italian phrase and dictionary yesterday. My husband, son and I decided to get out of the house, and went to Hastings (the book store). My husband and son wanted to go there for the video games, I wanted to go for the books. I love books, and love to learn. I don't always have to attention span to finish them. However, I do my best. I was even putting sentences together last night. I think that, I'll ask for a bigger, more detailed Italian book for my Birthday in March. Hopefully, it will have a CD with it.

I was looking for a book on Yoga too, they didn't have one that I could find anyway. I need to start doing somehting not so strenuous. I'm still being carful with myself, due to my surgery recovery. If I had my way, I'd buy some brushes and canvas too. I was planning on painting a picture of my now deceased Mother-In-Law. I think that, my husband would appreciate it. I plan on expanding my horizons, and leaning all sorts of differnt things this year. I just feel like a learning sponge.

I also plan on leaning all that I can to lean about the Catholic religion. My husband and his family are Catholic. I have several books on it, but they are boaring. My sons and I are going to convert, or get confirmed should I say. It should be an interesting year. Vedere Tu piu' tardi'! (See you later)

THE GOOD WITH THE BAD

2006-01-14T07:30:00.000-08:00

It's only 9:30 A.M., and I'm already both disgusted and relieved. My Mom called at 8:40 to see how my ex-husbands behavior was, after getting served yesterday afternoon. I was sound asleep, thank you so... very much Mom. My son called from his cell phone. He said that no one seemed to be upset, over his Father being served his papers. His step-mother had already gone to work, and he was the only one up. Furthermore, they made no plans for this weekend. It seems to be all good in his world today.

However, after speaking with my husband, I "just had to" hang up on him. I stated that, I was in no mood, to hear his belittlement. Again, I am going to start a journal, just to let him know, just how bad that he makes me feel. I get so tired of the daily disparaging remarks. You've heard the old saying, "if you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything at all." I am going to make a conscious effort to live that. I get so tired of everything, not being perfect in his eyes. No one, or nothing, is every the way "he" wants it.

From someone that was born into nothing, and came from nothing, he sure doesn't act that way. Appearently, I'm not Martha Stewart, a sex kitten, or a working Mother. Furthermore, I am still paying for his ex-wifes sin's. Meaning that I have to go beyond, and be an ever better person the she was on her worst day. I still don't work, even though I need to be. I don't dress up, put on make-up, nor do my hair everyday, like he wishes that I would. I'm lucky to get a shower, and put on a clean T-shirt, bra, underware and jeans. I may not look cute, but I'm clean, and I smell pretty good.

I was informed this morning that "THE HOUSE ISN'T IMMACULENT" like it should be, "IT'S ONLY PICKED UP." I had heard other things that didn't exactly make me feel good. However, it was that remark, that made me hang up. It is time to knock him down a peg or two again. His Mom told me a long time ago that, both he and his father need that. I think that, "Boy... you better remember what your knees are for." Se ya'll.

HIT THE FAN

2006-01-13T05:11:00.000-08:00

IT... is going to hit the fan this afternoon. I'm sure that, my ex-husband isn't going to be in such a "swell" mood when he picks up our son this evening. Remember, I met with my attorney Wednesday? Life as he now knows it, is going to change. Hopefully, he won't make an ass out of himself, in front of both my brother, and my son. He better not, take anything out on my son as well.

My borther is going to be here this afternoon, to make sure that none of the above happens. I'm sure that, I've lost you all. I just can't say too much just yet, especially today. That would be putting the cart before the horse. I'll talk to ya'll more tomorrow.

TO BLOG... OR NOT TO BLOG

2006-01-12T05:17:00.000-08:00

I am considering to, just shut my Blog down. I'm thinking that, no one ever reads my Blog. I never get any comments. Am I that boaring? For months, I have has the worse time joining a couple of Blog Rings. I honestly don't know what I'm doing wrong. My husband and I have tried to figure it out. If anyone can help me I would appreciate it. Se ya'll!

AND SO IT BEGINS

2006-01-11T05:07:00.000-08:00

In just a few short hours, I meet my Attorney. I will find out just how expensive it is going to be to both retain her; and put a stop to my former husband's Visitation Violations. The legal term is called, First Right Of Refusal. Which means if, he decides to leave my son with a Babysitter, I have the first right to refuse what he is about to do. I have the right to say no, bring him home to me. This is in case I don't know, or approve of who the Babysitter is. I have no problem with my former in-laws taking care of him.

It is the strangers, who are the supposed friends of my son's step-mother who I have a problem with. Just as my husband said, "if you don't know their last name, or address, then you don't know them." Again, we explain to our son that, even though they may know and trust them, we do not. I entertained the idea of, just rechecking with my former mother-in-law to see if, she helped put a stop to all of this per my request.

This way, no one would have to spend the money to take care of this. However, just as both my Attorney's husband and my husband said "this needs to be legalized." In the instance that, they keep leaving my son with strangers to take care of. Ya'll pray for me.

IF IT DOES NOT FIT

2006-01-10T04:30:00.000-08:00

I took all three of my sons, and the two neighbor girls to mass with me last Saturday evening. After over three years of living here in our town, I finally decided to try the Catholic Church. My family and I, are actually members of the Catholic Church the next town over. However, since we moved here, we have quit going. That actually isn't true. There are a lot of factors as of to why we do not attend church there anymore. My son attended school there for first and second grade as well. Again, there is much more to it.

When the previous Priest/Father was there, we ran into a lot of problems. I was in the process of converting to Catholicism. Graciously, my husband was attending those Religious Education classes with me, as a refresher course. I had also turned in, the required paper work to annul my first marriage. Father Ben suggested that I do so, for a couple of reasons. Number one, it would take some time, and have to go beofore the "Catholic Court." They would decide if, an annulment was in order. This process could take up to a year. I guess Physical Abuse was ify.

My husband's first marriage would even take less time to annul. According to Father Ben, the Catholic Church never recognized that marriage in the first place. His/their reasoning was, it never took place in a Church. My first marriage however did. I'll tell you, I was not happy when Father Ben made that reference. When he said that, the Church didn't recognize my husband's first marriage. You'll never guess who got married down town, at the Justice Of The Peace? My husband and I got married down town for several reasons.

The first reason being, we had both been married before. We were not going to put out a lot og money on a big, needless ceremony. We were so in love, that a big ceremony was not necessary. Another reason was because, it was Thursday. Thursday was my husband's day off that week. Sounds crazy doesn't it? Actaully, we had a bigger wedding planned, and in the works. Our Justice Of The Peace wedding took place in November. Our bigger wedding was to take place in February on Valentines Day. However, my husband decided to get a Compound, Open Fracture on his leg.

Gosh... I really got way off the point didn't I? What Father Ben was suggesting was, that even the most simplest things could not happen, before many others were to happen. I had to convert, or get confirmed in the Catholic church. Both my husband and I had to annul our first marriages. All three of my boys had to get Confirmend and Baptised, before they could Take Communion or got to Confession. It was like all of this had to happen before, he would even think about Baptising my children in the Catholic church.

Both my husband and I have been having some interesting conversations regarding God, Jesus, and the Bible. If I tell you what we were dicussing, it's hard telling what kind of response I'll get. So.. I have decided to spare you. I will tell you that, we have entertained the idea of looking elsewhere for a religion that fit us better. The religions/churches that we grew in don't seem to fit us anymore. Although, the ones that I did research last night on line, don't seem o fit either. Nothing seems to neither fit, nor answer the questions that both my husband and I have. Ya'll have any suggestions?

PEACE OF EARTH

2006-01-09T05:08:00.000-08:00

Did you ever notice, just how much noise there is, when all the kids are home? We have all three of our boys, only every other weekend. Thankfully, our middle son lives with us. Anyway, when it's just my son, husband and I, it's very quiet. However, when all three boys are here, it's deafening. Then, you throw in the other four neighbor kids, and it's madness. Some people might enjoy the noise. Although, I am not one of those people. I am more of a, children should be seen and not heard person. Not actually as bad as that sounded.

Schofield Law #1 states, that "NO CHILD, ANIMAL, ADULT, PHONE, TV, RADIO, OR BOOR BELL; SHOULD WAKE UP MR. SCHOFIELD ON, HIS ONLY CONSISTENT DAY OFF." This is also why, the kids and I went to Mass on Saturday evening. So that we all didn't have to go on Sunday. Never-the-less , I had to go in and swat number three son on his behind yesterday morning. He and son number two, were playing with the army men, on the floor of son number two's bedroom. Son number three, is only nine years old and still has a very squeaky voice. It can honestly get on your're nerves.

Ever since my husband and I began dating, they have been told this. You know, regarding The Schofield Law. Yes, even before we were married, we blended our weekends together with the kids. We always knew that, we were going to be together anyway. It was only a matter of time. Anyway, after I left the room, son number three told son number two , "that didn't hurt." Son number two said, "it wasn't supposed to." I had told son number three, "if you are going to scream, and act like a two year old, I'm going to treat you like one." That's why I swatted him once, on the behind.

At this point in our marriage, I had never lais a hand on either of my step-sons. I have always let my husband do that. Again, none of the kids have really ever given us much reason to spank them. Not that they have ever received a spanken before mind you, they have. Anyway, as my husand but it, "it was only an attention grabber." Having said that, it is once again quiet in our home, for atleast another two weeks that it. Take care ya'll.

WE'RE MOBILE

2006-01-07T07:04:00.000-08:00

This weekened, is our bi-weekly visit with the other two boys. My son lives with us, and is only gone the weekends when, the other boys are gone. We were eating dinner yesterday evening, and I was talking to all three boys. Suddenly, our oldest whipped out his new cell phone. Appearently, his Mother had bought him one for Christmas. I made sone #2, go and get his. He proudly produced his "Fire Fly" cell phone, to his older brother.

He knew that it wasn't exactly the same thing as a real cell phone. However, he is proud of it none-the-less. Again, son #1 didn't tease him in that regard either. He said, "that's pretty cool." Then, they exchanged cell phone numbers that the dinner table. Actually, I had to do that for him. It's funny, how last week my husband was throwing a fit about son #2 having a cell phone. However, when son #1 got one, it's not that big of a deal. It's actually pretty convenient now. We don't have to chase them down to tell them to come home, or wonder what they are doing. Last night for example, they were down at the neighbor girls house. Just to be sure, I called to see what they were doing.

I also had my brother, put son #1's cell phone number in his phone as well. Son #1, is always calling, to give him a hard time or something. I was talking to my husband later and said, "do you realize that, two out of three of our kids have cell phones?" I'm sure that, son #3 is feeling a little left out. Again, he is entirely too absent minded to have even the "Fire Fly" cell phone just yet. When we were younger and went outside to play, we were just left too face the world and whatever it held in store for us. Do Ya'll remember those days?

JUST FRIDAY

2006-01-06T05:04:00.000-08:00

I'm glad that today is Friday. It has been a long week. I'm seriously considering going into politics. Remember, I have been righting all of the wrongs in our lives this week? A small political job in our fair city, to start out. Maybe I could start out as a mamber of the city council. I have never once considered politics, it doesn't interest me. However, I do wish that I had a voice, that could be heard in some format. I've always loverd journalism. Although, I've never been formally trained. Just on the High School Newspaper. Anyway, I don't have too much on my mind today. Ya'll have a good weekend.